


can you hold me a little closer? (이 따뜻한 포옹 속에)

by onlywheniwalkaway



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Explicit Sexual Content, Falling In Love, Filming, Fluff and Smut, Kink Exploration, M/M, Nursing, Oblivious Kim Jongdae | Chen, Oral Fixation, Self-Indulgent, Whipped Park Chanyeol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:08:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 21,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28668990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlywheniwalkaway/pseuds/onlywheniwalkaway
Summary: Something weird about his boyfriend just blatantly staring at his chest. It wasn’t recently. Jongdae first thought that his body was there in the open, and Chanyeol had to look out of curiosity, but even after sex, Chanyeol still watched with lingering gazes, certainly having a problem with his chest specifically. Even when he was clothed, Chanyeol smiled down his chest whenever Jongdae was speaking. And he stared even more so when Jongdae wasn’t wearing a shirt.
Relationships: Kim Jongdae | Chen/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 12
Kudos: 45





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

* * *

Jongdae sat depressingly in front of his laptop.

A touch on his shoulders had him gasp because Jongdae remembered he wore nothing but loose briefs due to frustration, and Chanyeol’s fingers on his collarbone snapped him right out of his PhD thesis.

“Hey, sorry to have spooked you, but come eat dinner,” Jongdae tilted his head and looked up to Chanyeol in his black tank top luring him in for a treat. Chanyeol tried to not be obvious, but Jongdae already caught him staring down the expanse of his chest as he loomed over his small body, trying to trap him between the table.

The older whined, curling into himself further, trying to hide his chest. He sometimes forgot that Chanyeol might come back home early, having no mind to put on clothes as he felt most comfortable with his bare skin in the comfort of his room. Jongdae was always bashful being shirtless with others even if they were men.

Chanyeol didn’t mind him, of course. They were roommates-turned-boyfriends since last Christmas. The cheerful Christmas college party really brought their feelings to the front line, and Chanyeol jumped forth, making the first move, reading the shy glances from Jongdae correctly. Needlessly to say, Jongdae was still not used to Chanyeol’s blatant attraction to him. Whereas Jongdae was a lot subtler in his advances, Chanyeol just liked to cage him and get what he wanted. Not that Jongdae would complain. It was strange that a younger man like Chanyeol would go for him, but it seemed that Chanyeol had chosen.

That was why Chanyeol naturally tickled at his sides, making all the research connections he made in his mind gone with his restraint to smack Chanyeol in the face.

“Hyung!” With a cheeky grin, Chanyeol grabbed hold of his wrists, pulling him back to a stand and away from his desk so that Jongdae couldn’t really break out of the hold and make him step away from work.

To be truthful, Jongdae could’ve easily broken out of the hold, but he didn’t have the heart to just rip himself off Chanyeol who looked so excited just to tease him like this. Along with the fact that Jongdae rarely talked to him due to his workload, Jongdae let Chanyeol have his company. 

“Alright! Fine, I’ll go. Let me turn off my laptop and take a shower,” Jongdae was tired simply, his eyes couldn’t even look into Chanyeol’s at this point, staring blankly at his smaller wrists held in bigger hands.

Thankfully, Chanyeol let him go with a warm smile that Jongdae found endearing but not before his eyes flickered over Jongdae’s chest again.

His neck was burning as he rushed to the bathroom. Something weird about his boyfriend just blatantly staring at his chest. It wasn’t recently. Jongdae first thought that his body was there in the open, and Chanyeol had to look out of curiosity, but even after sex, Chanyeol still watched with lingering gazes, certainly having a problem with his chest specifically. Even when he was clothed, Chanyeol smiled down his chest whenever Jongdae was speaking. And he stared even more so when Jongdae wasn’t wearing a shirt.

He didn’t know what was wrong with his chest. His form was lean. He had some flesh, but it merely draped over his bones. His nipples… were there, existing peacefully on his two firm pecs. He had four shy abs if he tried to hold his breath and keep his form steady.

Maybe, he looked weird, and Chanyeol was scoffing in his own mind at how _normie_ of a body Jongdae had compared to the Muscle Chad Park Chanyeol he was.

Jongdae shook his head, pouting worriedly down at his chest.

Chanyeol might be concerned that he wasn’t eating well, and truth be told, Jongdae was worried about his healthy life as well. Despite Chanyeol cooking him deliciously meals and encouraging him to exercise, Jongdae found it hard to finish his plate no matter tasty the food was and couldn’t move a muscle after a five-minute run.

Jongdae then made a mental note to just get some supplements instead. Lacking in vitamins must have reverted him back to a virgin beta male.

With Chanyeol’s hoodie on, Jongdae waddled back to the kitchen and tried his best to finish dinner Chanyeol made for him. It was amusing to try to stuff it all down, but Chanyeol seemed just as amused at him munching down cheek full of food.

“Hyung, slow down. You’re going to be sick,” Chanyeol chuckled at Jongdae who was now hiccupping, pushing the glass of water forward to him.

“Yeol, you know I have to eat quickly, or I get full right after a few bites…”

Excusing himself to resume his researching, Jongdae went right back to his laptop once he was done with Chanyeol. His mind was occupied with work once more. After a long while, Jongdae noticed the clock read 11 in the corner of his screen. He groaned and closed his word file.

Jongdae got freshened up before bed and went back to his room, going into his closet for his thick blankets, stacking them on top of each other on the floor, pretending they were futons, lying down comfortably. But then, he remembered Chanyeol. He didn’t pay any attention to his boyfriend at all. Actually, nowadays Jongdae tended to treat him more of a useful roommate than a living breathing boyfriend that needed his attention.

Feeling the guilt coiling his toes, Jongdae turned off the lights in his room, brought his own blanket, and knocked on Chanyeol’s door.

“Come in, hyung.”

Right, Chanyeol stopped locking his door since they started dating. Jongdae really needed to get his stupid perfectionist brain out of the way if he wanted to be a good boyfriend.

“Yeol-ah, I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you…” Jongdae mumbled into the hoodie’s cuffs as he laid face-to-face on Chanyeol’s thin futon. “Talk to me. I want to hear your voice.” The older just realized he hadn’t heard anything but his own frustration for the whole day.

Chanyeol’s lamplight was dim in the night, but it was enough to see flushes on the younger’s cheeks brightened before him. Chanyeol didn’t sound as tired. He sounded peaceful, talking about his day and complaining about the friends who didn’t help out in his presentation, asking if Jongdae could check his paper later.

It was during a particular rant that Jongdae lost track of that Jongdae leaned forth to peck his rambling lips, drawing a surprise yet pleasant chuckle of Chanyeol.

“Hyung, what was that for?” He questioned, but he met Jongdae half-way again for another kiss, a little deeper, still gentle.

Jongdae smiled sheepishly snuggling closer until their foreheads were touching, his lips still tingled with Chanyeol’s taste. “I haven’t kissed you the whole day… Sorry.”

Chanyeol made a content hum when Jongdae held his cheek. His big eyes blinked at him sleepily and lovingly. “S’okay. Apology accepted.”

“Yeol… I have a question.”

“Hmm?” that sort of woke Chanyeol from the dazed look he had for Jongdae.

Jongdae drew his hand back, looked to the ceiling for a bit before asking him. “Do you… have a problem with my body?”

“What? No— not at all—” Chanyeol’s brain wasn’t working properly at the question, and it was okay because it was 12 in the morning already. “It’s the opposite—I love it. Hyung, why do you think that?”

“Oh, okay. If there’s nothing, it’s alright,” Jongdae nervously chuckled. Chanyeol’s hand came to soothe his forearm, looking back at big alarmed eyes now. “I just… I just thought you had something to say when you keep looking at my chest. I guess… you just like looking at me… um… that much?”

The younger boy looked like he was caught doing something wrong without his parents’ knowledge, slightly concerning Jongdae. Chanyeol shrugged into his own shoulders, biting his bottom lips.

“Don’t worry about it, Yeol-ah. I guess I read your expressions wrong… I thought you had something to say, you know,” trying to shake off his own bashfulness, Jongdae ruffled Chanyeol’s fluffy bedroom hair and pulled the blanket up to cover them both. “I’m little dense for a man in his thirties if you haven’t noticed, so if you have anything to say, please tell me, Yeollie.”

Jongdae tried to be as open as he could, urging Chanyeol to do the same, not that Chanyeol needed him saying that to him. Though it seemed like he didn’t pay much attention to Chanyeol, Jongdae was more than smitten with the kid. He had thought that his older self couldn’t get along much with college kids, but going back to college at this age and meeting Chanyeol proved himself wrong really. He really didn’t want to lose this one. He was too precious for Jongdae to walk away.

Chanyeol, on the other hand, blinked and took a deep breath. “Actually… I do have something to tell you. It’s nothing wrong with your body… it’s me, but—”

“Yes?”

“I… It might throw you off, but don’t be afraid to be honest with me, okay?” Chanyeol was searching for his eyes. Jongdae nodded and felt the nervousness seeping out of his skin, and his hand reached down to grab Chanyeol’s. They held each other’s hands for a while.

“Yeollie?”

“Can you hold me a little closer?” Chanyeol asked, his ears absolutely flaming, his eyes shifting from Jongdae’s eyes to his lips, his hands gripping tighter in Jongdae’s hold.

“In… in what way, Yeollie?” Jongdae didn’t know what he referred to. In his mind, it must be more than a hug and something related to sex. Though Jongdae was fine with either little or a lot of sex in the relationship, Jongdae had a feeling that this was probably more than just sex if Chanyeol was being so delicate and cryptic about it.

“Um… it’s a little weird, but you want me to be honest and tell you…” Chanyeol was rambling now, and Jongdae had to sit up from the comfy blankets and turn on the lights so that they could see each other’s reaction properly for this conversation to work. “I’m… I want…”

“Do you want me to hug you more? I supposed I haven’t been returning a lot of skinship, Yeollie. I’m sorry. I’ll do better.” Jongdae tried to confirm verbally. He smiled apologetically and patted Chanyeol’s head through it all.

“I don’t mean it that way...” Chanyeol gently shook his head underneath Jongdae’s touch.

“I won’t judge you, Yeollie.” Chanyeol was still in his blankets, lying on his side, staring up at Jongdae, breaking a sweat in this late at night.

“I love it when we have sex and all… but I want something else from you,” Chanyeol was slowly covering half of his face with his blanket now. It would’ve been cute if it didn’t freak Jongdae out too much of what exactly Chanyeol was going to say.

“It’s okay, Yeol-ah. We’re big boys, now. We can deal with big boy problems,” Jongdae tried to lighten up the mood, helping Chanyeol with his nerves. Because even though Chanyeol was more confident with his advances, Chanyeol was still shy with newer things, afraid of what older Jongdae might think of him. After all, Chanyeol was still young and afraid.

“Can you hold me closer… like um… cradling me?” by now Chanyeol was a tomato, and Jongdae tried to understand.

Slowly, Jongdae lowered himself that he leaned against the wall a bit with pillows supporting his back and pulled Chanyeol’s body up so that his fluffy head could rest on his chest, winding his left arm around the bigger boy’s shoulders, his fingers holding Chanyeol’s chin softly, his thumb tracing his jaws. “Like this?”

Chanyeol hummed pleasantly now, his head nuzzling into the older man’s chest, his right arm slid behind Jongdae’s back and returned the hold, settling nicely into Jongdae’s left side. Well, this wasn’t too bad, Jongdae thought. Soon, Jongdae acted like a body pillow for Chanyeol in this position. The younger’s left leg glided over Jongdae’s legs. For a moment longer, Chanyeol slowly melted into his hold. Jongdae didn’t even realize their muscles had been tensed this whole time, so he too relaxed into the embrace.

The older was about to ask what was wrong with simply holding each other like this that Chanyeol got so nervous about when Chanyeol’s left hand slid over his stomach, drawing a shiver down Jongdae’s spine. He realized too late that during their time in sex, Chanyeol’s hand was almost big enough to cover his belly. And it was alarmingly hot.

“Yeollie?” Jongdae asked, his eyes now met Chanyeol’s attentive ones.

Chanyeol didn’t blink this time, gazing up at him, reading Jongdae’s expressions carefully as he silently rubbed his palm over Jongdae’s stomach. Through the hoodie, Jongdae felt the warmth in Chanyeol’s hand and blushed. It was strange how even though Jongdae was higher in his leverage, he still felt that Chanyeol was towering over him with his big body just swallowing him up this way. “Can we try something different? Tell me to stop if it’s uncomfortable.”

“Oh. Okay.” Jongdae nodded firmly, trusting the younger to hold him well. “Go ahead, Yeollie.”

It was late, sure, but Jongdae had been stressed and felt guilty that he didn’t care for Chanyeol as much. And he wanted to do something for Chanyeol to make it up to him. This was the perfect time.

The goosebumps on his skin kept the sleep away from his mind as he tried to match Chanyeol’s heavy gaze for him.

His left hand came higher, gently resting on Jongdae’s pecs before Chanyeol let out a little hitch of breath, leaning up to Jongdae, eyes shifting to his lips. Jongdae easily complied to Chanyeol’s leads, leaning down to meet him half-way with a deep kiss that surprised him, sighing happily into hot insistent lips that seemed to want to swallow Jongdae whole. Jongdae slightly trembled at the younger’s tongue licking his bottom lip up to the tip of his nose playfully before diving tongue deep into his mouth.

Jongdae felt Chanyeol’s right hand behind him curl around him and held his smaller waist firmly while his left hand dug into the flesh of his pecs slightly. The older whined softly once thick fingers brushed against his right nipple. Then, his digits pinched his nipple lightly. A gasp dripped hotly out of his lips when Chanyeol drew back, looking raptly up at Jongdae’s shaky breaths as his fingers gently rolled his nipple through the thick fabric of his own hoodie.

It felt surprisingly nice. Tiny jolts of pleasing pressure against his nipple along with Chanyeol’s heavy gaze. Jongdae’s left arm curled a little harder around Chanyeol’s shoulders, his fingers slid up to Chanyeol’s mob of hair, mindlessly stroking his head, losing himself in Chanyeol’s touch.

It shouldn’t be too much already, but Jongdae was already growing hard in his sweat pants. It had been a while since they last slept together, and _this_ Chanyeol was different. They barely even started, and Chanyeol was only twisting his nipple softly, but Jongdae’s body was twitching along with teasing little pinches to his hard nipple.

“Yeollie?” A broken whisper.

Chanyeol hadn’t done anything else so far, his lips parted, his breaths warmed his left nipple through the fabric, his eyes glazed over, observing Jongdae’s every little gasp above him as his big fingers rolled and pinched his right nipple, slowly gaining speed and pressure. 

Then, with heated eyes that watched him, Chanyeol’s teeth grazed at his left nipple and bit into the nub before teething at his nipple through the hoodie this way, making Jongdae’s eyes rolled back at the gentle pleasant twists on his sensitive nipples down his body, filling up his cock.

Jongdae was breathing a little louder with Chanyeol playing with his nipples this way, his chest dipped low trying to force the air out and rose high trying to breathe back in. His toes curled when Chanyeol bit and twisted a little harder, but Chanyeol’s heavy left leg caged his legs from trying to open. Jongdae’s right hand held on Chanyeol’s right one on his waist while his left hand started to gently pull strands of hair unknowingly.

“Yeol…” Jongdae moaned softly at how Chanyeol rolled and twisted more. His teeth and fingers worked in rhythm, trying to rile Jongdae up, and it was certainly working. Jongdae’s body was moving on its own as well, but there was no relief in this hold. Surprisingly, Jongdae found this quite enjoyable, especially at how Chanyeol seemed to desperately cling on to him through it. It was driving him mad with the teasing, but it felt nice being suspended this way.

“Hyung…” a whimper called out to him, and Jongdae looked down to Chanyeol drooling over the patch of the hoodie, moaning breathily against the fabric over his nipple, still teething Jongdae incessantly. Jongdae felt his cock jerk in his pant at the sight. Then, Chanyeol was rolling his hips, letting his cock meet the flesh of Jongdae’s left thigh. The older was surprised at how hard Chanyeol was already.

“You want… _oh…_ to come like this?” Jongdae didn’t mean to be hot, but Chanyeol seemed to think so as he let out a heavy grunt against his pec. The fact that Chanyeol was using him to get off, rubbing his cock into his side in this much clothes made Jongdae lightheaded. Jongdae thought being with Chanyeol couldn’t be any hotter, but there they were.

He didn’t notice that Chanyeol changed his hands, with his right hand was now twisting and rolling his right nipple instead. Only when Chanyeol had his left hand down Jongdae’s pants and started jerking Jongdae’s cock roughly that Jongdae realized the change. “Hyung…” Chanyeol whined louder, relishing in the fact that Jongdae was moaning brokenly into the night, thrashing his small body wildly in his strong hold, arching his chest into his teeth and fingers for his nipples to be teased, thrusting his hips up for his straining hard cock to be jerked in his eager hand.

“ _Ah…_ Yeol… I’m… I’m so close.” Jongdae’s right hand gripped tightly Chanyeol’s futon while his left hand pushed Chanyeol’s head into his nipple harder. This was anything but penetrative sex, yet Jongdae had never been more turned on in his life, never been held this intimately before, it felt almost ecstatic when the older could feel Chanyeol’s cock gliding on his thigh.

Chanyeol grunted at his words, pulling Jongdae’s cock out of his pants, and moulding the tip of his hard cock with his palm roughly, alternating between jerking his length and the crown.

“ _Nnng…_ ” It was too much now that Jongdae couldn’t hold back. Chanyeol’s body holding his, Chanyeol’s heavy groans against his chest, Chanyeol’s spit wetting the fabric onto his pecs, Chanyeol’s teeth pulling his nipple, Chanyeol’s fingers twisting mercilessly at his nipple, Chanyeol’s big hand engulfing his cock, smearing his precum all over his cock, jerking his cock, Chanyeol’s cock rubbing at his side. Everything about Chanyeol was suffocating him, coiling in his stomach, rushing down his cock, building up before– “ _Chanyeol_ —”

Jongdae’s head fell back against the wall, his body arched strenuously into Chanyeol’s hold, letting out a long heavy groan as he came into Chanyeol’s hand that was still milking dry. Chanyeol didn’t stop playing with his nipple prolonging his orgasm. Soon, he was twitching harshly into Chanyeol’s movements, so Chanyeol stopped milking his nipples and his cock, but he was still rolling his hips into his thigh.

The older was still catching his breath, finally looked down to the come on his hoodie and slobbered all over Chanyeol’s hand that was still on his cock.

“Hyung—” Chanyeol looked up at him, head resting in Jongdae’s cradling arm, tears brimming his glassy eyes, lips wet with his spit, whimpering his name. “Jongdae-hyung, please—”

“Yeollie…” Jongdae’s right hand held Chanyeol’s left one that was full of come before shoving it into Chanyeol’s pants and feeling up his long hard cock slathering it with his own come. His cock pulsed hard the moment Jongdae thumbed roughly at the crown. And it was enough to have the tears spill from Chanyeol’s eyes. His left hand cradled the younger’s face gently, and he leaned down to kiss them away, holding his cock in his palm. “Fuck me.”

Chanyeol sniffled before he began thrusting wildly into Jongdae’s hand, loud unrestraint broken moans spilt against his chest, his drools still pouring from his swollen parted lips battered against the hoodie’s thick fabric, his glazed-over eyes trying to meet Jongdae’s hooded gaze that watched him thrust his thick cock into his smaller hand. Chanyeol was so rough with his hand that Jongdae shivered at the thought of that much strength slamming into his hole. They had never been that rough with each other before. Even more so, Jongdae had never seen this kind of desperation in sex before, not even from Chanyeol. This was more than thrilling to watch.

Jongdae heard it first before he felt it. Chanyeol grunted huskily, nuzzled into his chest as he came into Jongdae’s hand, thick come coated his delicate fingers, riding in his hold until he went limp against Jongdae.

At this point, Jongdae thought he should be taking care of the younger, combing gently through his hair until his breathing was even again. When Chanyeol tried to move, Jongdae smiled and kissed him gently on the forehead.

“I’ll take care of you, okay?” Jongdae whispered into his hair, calming Chanyeol down at how he tried to detach himself from his hold.

The older sat up, simply took off his clothes, leaving his boxers on before doing the same to Chanyeol, wiping the come with his hoodie and threw the clothes away to the corner of the room. He didn’t want to be dirty, but he didn’t want to leave Chanyeol alone too long as well. He’d deal with the laundry tomorrow. So, he quickly went back into cradle Chanyeol who let out into a pleased hum when Jongdae held his face close to his heart.

“Thank you, hyung.” Chanyeol sleepily mumbled into his chest.

Jongdae beamed down at the peaceful face in his hold. He was surprised at how comfortable this was despite how big Chanyeol’s head was. Then again, being Chanyeol’s body pillow wasn’t that bad he realized. “Good night, Yeollie.”

In the morning, in the comfort of Chanyeol’s futon, Jongdae woke to Chanyeol’s eyes blinking sleepily up at him.

“Hello, you,” Jongdae smiled but broke into a yawn, trying to blink away the sleepiness. Soon, the memories of last night flooded his system as his eyes caught the clothes he threw haphazardly across the room just hours ago. “Did you sleep well?”

Chanyeol whined and blushed, turning his head away, hugging him closer. It was nice staying warm with Chanyeol in his hold.

For once, it wasn’t Jongdae that was shying away from their intimate acts. Jongdae understood because this was something that Chanyeol had kept to himself for a long time. Seeing how vulnerable the younger was, Jongdae returned the hold. With a gentle voice, Jongdae nudged Chanyeol to look up at him. “Yeollie, talk to me, will you?”

“Is it weird, hyung?” Chanyeol’s voice was small, and Jongdae smiled down at his worried eyes.

“Not as weird as I thought,” Jongdae shrugged.

“Was I … too much?”

“Yes. But I like you being too much.” Jongdae was still amazed and trembled under Chanyeol’s transparent attraction for him, of course. And last night was on another level, but it seemed to only make Jongdae curious to want to see more. “It’s so _you_. And I like you.”

“Okay. Okay,” Chanyeol was saying more to himself, but Jongdae could see the confidence was growing back in the way he smiled up at him, eyes full of hope. “Is… is it alright if I ask for more?”

Jongdae thought it was certainly Chanyeol’s eagerness that rubbed off on him. If it had been someone else, Jongdae wasn’t sure if he would’ve been as enthusiastic as he was at the moment. “Of course.”

It was the combination of stress from work and lack of intimacy for Chanyeol that drove Jongdae to accept it. This way he should be able to look after Chanyeol properly. He was the elder one, of course. It shouldn’t be difficult to make time for him when Chanyeol was doing more, juggling between a part-time job and college life.

Jongdae was already stable with a job as a professor in a different university, but he got a scholarship for a PhD degree in Chanyeol’s college. He was teaching freshmen at the time, but if he took higher steps, it meant he’d get to teach older students as well. For now, Jongdae was focusing on his research, living off on the scholarship’s money. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was in his third year of media and communication in his college. He wanted to be working in a broadcasting station, a radio host once he was out of college.

The older was looking for a place to stay when he came to this neighbourhood, and Chanyeol rented out his apartment at the right time, splitting the bill between them. It was so easy with Chanyeol. The younger was happy to show him around his own college on his first day. Even more so he offered to cook for him and do most of the housework. Jongdae tried to contribute, but Chanyeol seemed to keep beating him to it.

Only now that Jongdae realized that despite everything they’d been through so far, what Chanyeol wanted was quite endearing. All this time, no matter how capable Chanyeol tried to be for Jongdae, he was still looking for Jongdae to take care of him.

“Let me cook for you this month, won’t you, Yeollie? Focus on your mid-terms.” Jongdae reached across the table, poked at Chanyeol forehead as they were eating dinner a week later. “Let hyung take care of you, hmm?”

Chanyeol’s mouth was full when he whined cutely at Jongdae’s rough ruffling in his hair. The younger drew back, shaking his head away from Jongdae’s hand.

Jongdae chuckled brightly at the younger. He hated being treated but when… Jongdae held back his thought. He was too shy on his own even think it through his thoughts about Chanyeol.

This time, it was Chanyeol that came to his room. Jongdae didn’t even hear him. Then again, since that night Jongdae didn’t even bother to close his door anymore, letting the light of his room spill outside. Usually, it bothered him greatly, being aware of his unlocked door, but he wanted to let Chanyeol know that he could call for Jongdae and come to him without feeling bad about interrupting his workflow. And it helped him grow even closer to the younger even though their routine didn’t change much at all. Chanyeol could just walk in to place snacks and food on his desk, stealing kisses from him even when Jongdae didn’t realize he was in the room.

Jongdae was stuck in trying to find the connection between journals once he felt Chanyeol’s chin resting lightly on his head. The older’s lips stretched into a smile, and he reached up to pet the younger’s hair. “Hello.”

“Hi,” Chanyeol said cutely, arms wrapping around Jongdae’s shoulders. “Can I stay in your room?”

“Of course.” Jongdae sounded too happy at that, but he could tell Chanyeol was just as happy to hear him.

There shouldn’t be anything different really. Jongdae had been sleeping over at Chanyeol’s room, holding Chanyeol close as he’d asked of him. Being in his room now should be the same, right?

Well, not really, it turned out because Jongdae usually went to Chanyeol’s room once he was finished with work. But this time it was still right after dinner, and it was Chanyeol that came over to set Jongdae’s blankets out on the floor already. Jongdae thought it was adorable of him to want to spend his time studying with Jongdae in the same room.

Then, the clock popped into Jongdae’s face, saying it was 11 already, forcing him to stop working and go get ready for bed. When Jongdae turned around to rest his arm on the top rail of his chair, the older couldn’t suppress a bright smile seeing how messy the books were stacked on top of each other on the floor and Chanyeol slumping over his blankets, looking down at Chanyeol’s frustrated eyes.

Chanyeol’s head perked up from his books as well.

“Hyung… Can you help check my paper?”

“Today’s been rough for both of us. Let’s take a shower as a refresher, and I’ll check it before bed. How about that?” Jongdae gently offered.

Soon, the two were shampooing each other’s hair happily. Calmly standing next to one another under the spray, Jongdae held back a snicker when he noticed Chanyeol eying his chest again. It only made Chanyeol even more blatant with his stares since that night, a thing that Jongdae had once thought not possible. Once they finished their shower, they brushed their teeth next to each other, poking at each other with their elbows playfully.

This was closer than they were before. Jongdae once didn’t think he had time for Chanyeol, but it was far from the truth. They had plenty of time together. They just had to try. Well, Jongdae had to try.

Then, Jongdae was sitting on his blankets with Chanyeol’s laptop on his laps while Chanyeol was cleaning up his books and setting them aside for the night.

As Jongdae got into correcting Chanyeol’s grammar and commenting on the coherence of his wordings, Chanyeol was lying on his side, facing up at him with a shy smile, watching him quietly.

“Hello.” Jongdae peeked at the younger’s eyes from time to time, telling Chanyeol that certain parts of his essay needed more clarity in the way he presented the evidence. And Jongdae thought Chanyeol’s eyes were straying again to his chest. The older chuckled to himself and decided to just leave all the comments in the word file since the younger wasn’t going to be in the right mind to listen to him at all. “And… done…”

It was 12 o’clock already, and Jongdae saw Chanyeol dozing off by his sides. This looked too adorable to let go, so Jongdae found his phone and took a picture before turning Chanyeol’s laptop off.

“Yeol…” Jongdae didn’t want to wake him, but Chanyeol was sleeping horizontally, his legs on the floor, his body on Jongdae’s blankets.

“Hyung,” Chanyeol was quick to get with the program that it surprised Jongdae, turning his body vertically and resting on his elbow, waiting for Jongdae to hold him again.

“Aw.”

Jongdae turned the lights off and got ready for bed, lying on his back, letting Chanyeol hold on to his left side, cradling his head close with his left hand, coiling his right leg with Chanyeol’s left one that swung over him, petting Chanyeol’s left arm that curled around his waist.

“Yeol?” Jongdae was trying to sleep, but he could feel Chanyeol still awake staring up at him.

Chanyeol let out a hum.

“You need something?” Jongdae opened his eyes and yawned happily before seeing the younger’s eyes growing needy somehow.

“Um, are you tired?” The younger asked quietly.

Jongdae chuckled at the question. “Depends on what you ask of me.”

Chanyeol’s ears flushed as he muttered loud enough for Jongdae to hear. “Can you… touch me while I … hold you?”

Jongdae nodded, smile a welcoming smile.

This time, they were wiser with their clothes off. Chanyeol craned his neck to kiss Jongdae hungrily, his left hand roaming happily over Jongdae’s chest. The older still didn’t see why Chanyeol was so fascinated, but if it made Chanyeol that happy, it was enough of a reason for Jongdae to understand. Jongdae’s right hand was palming Chanyeol’s left leg that was on top of him, fingers digging in the meaty thigh.

Then, his fingers were twisting and pulling at his nipples. With Chanyeol’s lips bare against his chest, Jongdae shuddered at the gentle sucks on his nipple. Chanyeol’s tongue drooled and licked at his nipples, his pecs before taking bites and suckling at his flesh. Jongdae could only hold his head closer, fingers winding in his hair, for now, not wanting to go down Chanyeol’s boxers yet.

With Chanyeol’s tonguing his skin this way, it was more heated for Jongdae to handle, his cock hardening under Chanyeol’s touches quickly. Soon, Chanyeol just latched on to his nipple and his finger tightening and twisting around his other nub. Whenever Jongdae made a noise that told Chanyeol he was going too hard, the younger’s hand trailed down to soothe his little belly, palming his waist, running up and down his abs before going back to tease his nipple again. And just like that, Chanyeol’s little mewls as he suckled on him made his cock twitch. Jongdae then felt Chanyeol’s cock rubbing against his thigh, and he looked down to Chanyeol’s eyes closed in so much delicate concentration, sucking and biting his nipple, twisting and rolling in his fingers, trying to gauge what Jongdae responded to, and doing more of it, making Jongdae writhe weakly in his hold, making Jongdae pull on to his strands for leverage.

If Jongdae’s nipples weren’t sensitive before, they were now. It felt so long the way Chanyeol just settled contently in his embrace and suckle him with intensity, playing with them to his wants, perfectly happy to stay like this as long as Jongdae allowed, and it made Jongdae toes curl at how much Chanyeol got off from just this.

The older was sure that Chanyeol must have been more than happy to stay like this, but the younger did ask him to touch him, so Jongdae gently lifted Chanyeol’s leg off him to stuff his right hand into Chanyeol’s boxers, ignoring his own painful erection, drawing a broken whimper from the younger’s lips that became so swollen just by sucking his chest and nipples. 

Jongdae pulled Chanyeol’s cock out, eyes rolled back at the feeling of his precum already spilling into his hand, sighing at the heaviness of it, relishing in the way his cock filled his hand even more with each stroke. As he slowly jerked Chanyeol in his hand, Chanyeol didn’t bother thrusting at all, moaning a little loud when Jongdae twisted his wrist the right way, biting and twisting Jongdae’s nipples a little harder in retaliation.

The older sighed in bliss as Chanyeol started to pull and twist on his nipples at the same time, in turn tugging on Chanyeol’s thick cock even harder. Time to time, Chanyeol’s teeth nibbled him just right that Jongdae’s fingers failed him, losing hold of his cock, his body busy curving into Chanyeol’s hot lips and thick fingers.

“Hyung… can you… touch yourself?” With a raspy, broken voice, Chanyeol mumbled into his chest, eyes so dark staring up at him, teeth didn’t stop biting, lips still suckling, nipple rolled harshly between his finger and thumb.

Jongdae threw his head back, moaning at how hot his deep voice sounded requesting such a thing, his left hand gripped Chanyeol’s hair and pushing his face harder against his chest, his right hand quickly pulled out his own cock and jerk himself to match Chanyeol’s relentless twists and pulls.

Chanyeol seemed to urge him on, heaving pleased sighs against his chest, his eyes closed in concentration, moving against Jongdae’s arching body, revelling in Jongdae’s heavy moans as the older was getting himself off from Chanyeol playing with his nipples.

“Hyung…” with the way Chanyeol’s gaze swallowed him whole as well as his lips and fingers, Jongdae cried out in bliss when he felt the heat rushing down his cock, slowly building up to his release.

It was quite crude that the only loud noises came from his lips and the slick of his fingers working his own cock while Chanyeol kept quiet playing with his nipples.

Finally, Jongdae’s chest bowed upward into Chanyeol’s merciless lips and fingers, his hand tugged himself through the haze of his release, his left hand coiled impossibly tighter into Chanyeol’s strands. Once he got back his sanity, Jongdae went back to feel up the swollen cock. With renewed post-orgasmic effort, Jongdae smugly smiled down at deep wrecked growls on his chest as Jongdae jerked him off with his own come, feeling the hot length pulsed and twitched so hard in his hand. His cock jolted when Jongdae gripped a little too rough, his fingers digging into Jongdae’s chest and his waist as he held on to Jongdae through it all.

It was just as adorable seeing how Chanyeol was reduced to just panting hard against his nipples. The younger was too turned on in his mind to function properly anymore. Shivers run down Jongdae’s ruined torso, feeling hot saliva just dripped heatedly onto his pecs. Gradually, Chanyeol held on to him closer and harder, the closer he got to climax.

“Yeol-ah, look at you. So pretty getting off on my tits…”

It was embarrassingly fast at how Chanyeol seemed to come on command the moment he uttered those words. Jongdae would’ve made fun of him if Chanyeol hadn’t been so insanely attractive when he grunted out his release with a voice so deep, thrusting his hips erratically and mindlessly, riding out his orgasm in Jongdae’s hand, breathing harshly through his lips.

Jongdae knew that Chanyeol liked hearing him, so Jongdae checked, and Jongdae did get results. The older would definitely try harder for Chanyeol if it meant these were the results.

Now that he was himself again, Chanyeol was completely mortified at himself with what Jongdae said and curled into Jongdae’s body, nuzzling his face against his bare chest with a soft whine.

Jongdae chuckled tiredly and blissfully before reaching out to his shirt to wipe them down and pulling the blanket from the side to cover the both of them up.

“You’re cute.”

“ _Hyung…_ ” Chanyeol’s left hand came to smack his stomach, and Jongdae tightened his hold around the bigger man that found comfort in his smaller body, leaning down kiss him on the top of his head gently.

Days later, Jongdae woke to Chanyeol snoring on his stomach. That was why he kept dreaming of a really heavy rock on his belly.

The older stretched himself and looked around Chanyeol’s room before realizing he had to go to college and meet his supervisor in the morning.

“Yeollie…”

Chanyeol had this little habit where he tended to snooze a little longer when he laid his head on top of Jongdae.

“Let’s hurry… I’m going with you, today, Yeol-ah.” Jongdae poked Chanyeol’s head enough that the younger craned up with big hopeful eyes.

“To college?” his husky morning voice rumbled against his belly.

“Um, I’ll probably stay in the library later after meeting my professor, and we can have lunch together if you want?”

Chanyeol was quick to rise after that. Now and again, Jongdae had to leave the apartment and look for extra materials, read references in Chanyeol’s college, meet up with his supervisor to discuss his findings and data, and collect his primary data from reliable samples. He rarely ever went out for other purposes, having no mood to join parties or eat out with friends unless he was obligated to. In fact, if that Christmas party hadn’t required his presence and his professor didn’t force him to go, Jongdae wondered when Chanyeol and he would actually confess to each other. The younger didn’t say much about how he refused to leave the apartment, but once Jongdae did, Chanyeol was more than ecstatic. Even if he wasn’t going with Chanyeol, the younger was happy, and if Jongdae was with him, it made it all the better for Chanyeol.

Because Jongdae was with him, Chanyeol decided to have them get ready early and walk to the campus together. On the way, Chanyeol offered to buy them coffee and sandwiches as they walked side by side. Jongdae thought that this was definitely a change. This could probably count as a date, so Jongdae focused his attention on Chanyeol’s ramblings on his part-time job as a waiter again.

Only once Jongdae had to head to a different department did they had to part. Chanyeol pouted at their little waves of goodbye, but Jongdae promised to let the younger come to pick him up from the library once Chanyeol was done with his session so that Jongdae could walk Chanyeol to his part-time job as well. Like that, Chanyeol’s ears flushed brightly crimson even from behind.

Later in the morning as Jongdae was nose-deep in his references, Chanyeol took a seat next to him surprising the older.

“Hello!” A happy whisper Jongdae sent to Chanyeol who slumped down on his table, head resting happily in his arms, looking up at him with big pretty eyes. “Wait, let me copy some of these pages, and we can go.”

When they left the campus, Jongdae could’ve sworn he heard Chanyeol’s name being called. The older laughed at how Chanyeol pulled him closer and sped up in his walks, trying to run away.

“You’re supposed to eat with your friends, huh?”

“Nope. Don’t care. Let’s go, hyung!” Chanyeol chuckled along with Jongdae and held him by the shoulders, continuing their walks.

Somewhere deep down Jongdae felt guilty that he only realized he loved hanging out with Chanyeol this much. He had had a crush on the kid, sure. Chanyeol was so bright and sincere, easily spooked and hurt, unafraid to burst out in front of him, and Jongdae was fond of that, being drawn easily into Chanyeol’s charms. With him coming to him so confidently, Jongdae knew Chanyeol must have liked him first. Even now that they were eating lunch together, Jongdae only saw how serious Chanyeol was treating him. And it only confirmed that Jongdae should be more thoughtful of the younger. They did have something between them, and Jongdae intended to keep it around.

Chanyeol waved shyly in front of him when they were at the coffee shop where Chanyeol worked. Jongdae looked around, shrugged, and walked in the shop with Chanyeol who blinked at his actions. 

“This isn’t home, hyung?” Chanyeol tilted his head cutely, looking down at Jongdae nodding nonchalantly watching the people hanging in the coffee shop with their books and laptops.

“Hmmm, there are what they called pretentious researchers around. I thought I’ll fit in very well,” Jongdae grinned at Chanyeol, reaching out to pat his back. “I’ll be your customer, today, Yeollie.”

While Chanyeol’s task manager crashed, Jongdae walked to the counter and ordered a coffee before walking pass Chanyeol again, urging him to go change, pinching his cheeks cutely.

Jongdae was back reading his books again by the glass window. For Jongdae, it wasn’t hard to concentrate even when there were background music or people’s chatting noises. Jongdae had been dealing with these distractions for so long, it was easy to just focus the moment he started reading and noting down statements.

Sometimes, when Jongdae had to rest his eyes and look away from the book, his eyes would wander to the streets and the trees through the glass window before unconsciously looking back in the shop trying to find Chanyeol. Each time Jongdae always caught Chanyeol staring his way to which Jongdae smiled back, making a cute face towards his young boyfriend before turning his attention back to work. 

Jongdae was resting his chin on the heel of his palm, yawning the blurry tired tears out his eyes when he felt a finger poked at his cheek.

“My shift is done, hyung.” Chanyeol, bright and happy, beamed down at him and moved around his table to gather his books and laptop for him while Jongdae was still stretching.

“Okay, what’s for dinner, Yeol?” Jongdae stood up, watching Chanyeol stole his backpack, wearing both his and Jongdae’s backpack on both shoulders, earning a snicker from the older.

“Let’s order in. I was going to go grocery shopping, but… I want to walk you home instead.” Chanyeol smiled cheekily, hands gripping to the straps of their backpacks on his shoulders, and Jongdae chuckled at him, booping his nose before walking out the place, opening the door for big heavy Chanyeol to get through.

“Do grocery shopping on the weekends. I’ll go with you.”

“Hyung…” Chanyeol drew out a breath, making Jongdae look at him weirdly.

“Is there something wrong?” Jongdae saw the nervousness building up in those big eyes again.

“You don’t have to accompany me so much…”

“Ah,” Jongdae nodded, surprised that Chanyeol didn’t like him being too involved. “Oh, sorry. I was too pushy? Your co-workers said something to you about me?”

“No, no— It’s not that…”

“Okay. I just realize I like hanging out with you, but it’s alright if you don’t like it, I’ll try to keep a bit of distance.” Jongdae was somewhat a little sad, but he supposed he couldn’t be too clingy now. Even when Chanyeol liked him more he liked the younger, Chanyeol still gave him space.

“No, no! I don’t mean— I like hanging out with you, too. It’s just… you’re taking time out of work. I don’t want to disturb you, hyung.” Chanyeol had stopped walking, digging the heels of his sneakers into the sidewalk, eyes casting down at the rocks.

“Aw, is that so?” Relieved at the simple fact, Jongdae tilted his head to the side, finding Chanyeol’s worried eyes. Jongdae poked his forehead with his finger, pushing his head back up from looking down. “Yeollie, you’re not disturbing me. We’re both so busy now that it’s been so long since we’ve been on a date. This little thing counts, you know. Do you like it when I’m around?”

Chanyeol nodded shyly.

“Okay, I’ll see to it our schedules align so we can do more stuff together.”

That night Chanyeol fell asleep fast on his chest, snoring softly on his left side. Jongdae found himself stroking his hair, staying soft in Chanyeol’s warm hold, falling asleep as he breathed in Chanyeol’s shampoo.

Nights later, on his way back from the bathroom, Jongdae saw Chanyeol sitting cross-legged on his blankets, not doing anything. Jongdae finished today’s tasks a little early at 10 o’clock. The older had asked if Chanyeol wanted to join the shower, but Chanyeol stayed glued to Jongdae’s room.

“Yeol? Something wrong?” Jongdae took a seat next to him, staring at Chanyeol’s pretty pink face.

The younger must have wanted him to hold him again. They had been doing that for a while now on Chanyeol’s impulses. Sometimes, Chanyeol just wanted to fall asleep with Jongdae cradling him. Sometimes, Chanyeol asked to latch on. Overall, Jongdae was alright with both. The older was content in their relationship even though they hadn’t had actual sex for long. The hand jobs during these sessions with Chanyeol were so intense it felt like he’d enough sex for the whole year. The fact that his nipples had become more sensitive the more Chanyeol played with them didn’t help really. At this point, as long as Jongdae knew it was Chanyeol that brushed against his chest, Jongdae’s mind was filled with long moments of quiet pleas and gentle sucks on his nipples along with Chanyeol’s heated face, eyes shut in focus, trying to make him come from playing with his tits.

“I’m curious about… when you hold me,” Chanyeol started, his fingers fiddling, his ears absolutely blazing. “I can see your face, but… I just keep… getting distracted…” _Right_ , Chanyeol liked to close his eyes in concentration while mercilessly winding up Jongdae like a guitar string.

There was silence for a while. “Yeollie?”

“Can I … record it?” his voice was so small. Chanyeol whined into himself and flopped himself down on the blankets, back facing him, curling into himself, realizing how terrible that sounded out loud. “So— sorry, hyung. That was… weird. I ask too much of you. It’s alright… for— forget what I said.”

So, Chanyeol wanted to see his face in clarity. Jongdae sighed at the shivering boy in front of him.

It was certainly strange because that would mean they would be making pornographic videos of themselves. Jongdae had never even engaged in the art of sexting or sending nudes with anyone, not even Chanyeol. He had been in cheesy normie vanilla relationships. The older man was really only weirded out at the fact that he was simply going straight to making porn before trying out the level one stuff.

Oh, well. Lucky him?

When Jongdae was silent for too long, Jongdae thought he could hear a small broken whine from Chanyeol from below. “Hey, Yeollie…”

“I’m so.. sorry. Don’t be mad, hyung.” Chanyeol still had his back at him, clearly very much embarrassed.

“It’s okay,” Jongdae rubbed gently on his biceps. “So, my phone or yours?”

“Preferably mine.”

“Okay.” Jongdae nodded, voice gentle.

“Wait— WHAT—”

“Do we put it on a stand, or do I hold it?” They didn’t have a stand… Jongdae could stack his books up, but that meant he’d probably go straight to hell for using his educational textbooks for such purposes. Jongdae could hold the phone with his right hand though. It was free most of their sessions… Jongdae blushed at the thought that his right hand would sometimes just clutched onto the blankets so tightly he could’ve ripped it if he went harder, wondering if he could film them properly.

The thought of his own face making weird expressions made him shy, but remembering that Chanyeol could possibly get off on it made him feel a little braver. It sounded hot, and with Chanyeol, Jongdae took the suggestion to heart quickly.

“I can hold with my right hand… but it’s going to be a little shaky if you don’t mind.”

Jongdae was too busy trying to map out the direction of where this could go to see the excitement bubbling on Chanyeol’s flushed face.

“Um, you’re not going to post it online, no?” Jongdae looked back down to Chanyeol whose eyes went impossibly big.

“WHAT— No! I wouldn’t! I mean— I’ll watch it— um, it’s of me and you… if you want to watch as well… I—” Chanyeol never looked so annoyed at Jongdae for accusing him of such a thing, but he was also so bashful at the things he was saying. It was a confusing time for Chanyeol, but Jongdae was mellow at his reaction, knowing he should be mindful of Chanyeol’s feelings.

“So… is that all?” Jongdae gauged Chanyeol’s expressions that turned nervous again. Chanyeol slowly sat back up, crossing his legs like Jongdae.

His hand was scratching at his nape when he timidly said, “There is more…”

It had been a while this feeling of being stretched by Chanyeol’s fingers. Compared to Jongdae’s slender ones, Chanyeol’s fingers were thicker, and they were pushing in and out of him so steadily, making him heave desperate little noises as he squirmed against them on his back.

Chanyeol was on his elbows, kneeling before his naked body, staring up his cock and balls up to the expanse of his torso, fingers curling and thrusting gently to ease Jongdae the discomfort.

Jongdae tried to focus on his own body, trying to remember how much he needed to take to get ready for Chanyeol. His back straightened up as he leaned back on the pillows supporting him. His fingers clenched at his blankets before his eyes caught Chanyeol’s phone by his right side. It was sudden when Chanyeol decided to curl into his prostate, pulling all the muscles in his thighs tight. His palm wandered to the phone regardless of the way Chanyeol’s fingers make his body arch. He had to film this for Chanyeol.

Chanyeol had agreed with him filming it despite the … angles Jongdae might fail to steady as Chanyeol was going to completely ruin his torso with his fingers and his lips. His bright eyes were eager to see the end product. Jongdae didn’t chastise him for trying to make him film the video like it would come straight out of the _‘amateur’_ category.

The older made amends with himself, trying not to think too much of his own expression as he opened up the front camera because Chanyeol had suggested that it would be easier if Jongdae knew if he was filming it right or not. Again, Jongdae didn’t call out Chanyeol for being so blatant with his porn preferences.

Horizontally Jongdae tried to hold the phone because Jongdae knew without Chanyeol telling him that he didn’t want to miss any part of his torso. That was the whole thing from the start after all.

“Yeol…” Jongdae’s cock was already so hard and pulsing, leaking all over his stomach with the way Chanyeol fingered him so intently. How was he going to handle another ten minutes of Chanyeol just milking his tits dry?

“Hyung…” Chanyeol understood, removing his fingers, moving up to kiss the older heatedly, tongue rolling against Jongdae’s for comfort.

Ignoring his duty to film, Jongdae wrapped his arms around Chanyeol’s neck, pulling him close for a deeper kiss. Chanyeol’s lips had always been nice to kiss. Knowing where Chanyeol liked to put them only made his toes dig into his blankets. Jongdae felt their cocks brush for a moment and groaned into the needy kiss.

Chanyeol drew away, uncaring of how his saliva just dripped onto Jongdae’s chin, eyes glassy with want.

“Go ahead.” Jongdae nodded, and Chanyeol laid on his side, slotting himself into Jongdae’s left arm.

The older gulped in nervousness and haziness as his right hand turned on the front camera and started filming the length of their bodies moulding against each other, Chanyeol laying his head comfortably on his chest, blowing hot air against his nipple, his eyes staring up at Jongdae unblinking hungrily, his right hand caressing his small waist from below, his left hand out of frame trying to line up his thick cock with the hole he had stretched, the tip of Jongdae’s cock curving hard into his stomach.

Chanyeol’s legs were below his left leg that swung over Chanyeol’s thighs. This way Chanyeol could stuff his cock into his hole.

It was the coldness of the latex of the condom that pulled him out of his focus of the camera he was staring into. The blunt tip of Chanyeol’s thick crown pushed into his hole and hot lips bit into his nipple, wringing a strained moan out of him. Jongdae’s eyes rolled back hard, his lips parted at the slow intrusion. He could feel his cock spurted more precum on to his own stomach at Chanyeol’s fingers already pulling his right nipple and his teeth biting along with his tongue flicking hotly against the other sensitive nub, and Chanyeol hadn’t even entered him fully yet. Jongdae’s body was burning up, his fingers clutched at Chanyeol’s hair when Jongdae looked down to see that Chanyeol was into suckling him already, brows furrowed in heated attention, eyes closed, lips busy flicking, sucking, licking, fingers pulling, twisting, pinching.

It was Jongdae that rolled his body down, fucking himself weakly onto Chanyeol’s still heavy cock. The younger didn’t move his hips, happily content in letting Jongdae warm his cock this way as he suckled and played with Jongdae’s pretty nubs. Jongdae didn’t miss the little pulsating movements in Chanyeol’s cock, however. Every time Chanyeol bit and twisted pleasing jolts down into his tits, Jongdae’s breathes hitched, moans spilt into Chanyeol’s hair, his hole clutched down hard around the thick flesh, making it jerk and pulsate inside him. It was so much easier now for Chanyeol to vex him as his nipples grew more and more sensitive the longer Chanyeol played with them. 

He almost forgot the existence of the camera as well, being close to dropping Chanyeol’s phone, but Jongdae steadied his right hand and looked back into the camera to make sure he was filming his whole torso for Chanyeol to see. The older was more than embarrassed as he looked at himself so turned on out of his mind, hair stuck on his forehead, face flushed red, neck burning and straining, chest swelled with Chanyeol’s bites and pinches and dripping in Chanyeol’s spit. Jongdae’s cock wasn’t completely in view, but the leaking come from his tip dripping onto his stomach would probably be quite the tasteful _amateur_ angle that director Chanyeol would want.

Jongdae’s head spun in drunken lust as he watched back and forth between Chanyeol’s fucked-out face on his chest below him to his own face in the video.

It was a particularly nice bite bordering between pain and pleasure that had Jongdae’s body completely rolled down further, stuffing himself with all of Chanyeol’s cock, drawing broken needy moans out of them both. Chanyeol’s cock had been teasing nearing his prostate this whole time, but now the tip was massaging right on it every time Jongdae rolled his body down.

“Yeollie…” Jongdae’s voice was breathless, husky from all the lust. “Make me come like this.”

“ _Hnnn… Hyung…_ ” Chanyeol’s whine was loud. The younger’s eyes snapped open, detaching himself from his chest, leaning up to tongue fuck Jongdae out of his mind as his cock drove even further into his heated hole. Chanyeol suckled at his skin messily trailing from his lips, his jaws, his neck, his collarbone, before going back to teeth at his nipple again.

The first actual thrust Chanyeol’s cock crammed into him tore a desperate cry out of him. Chanyeol thrust into him slow and calculating as he wound and twisted his nipples. The younger grunted louder and louder as his thrusts sped up with more intensity.

Jongdae was constantly whining and moaning at this point. His nipples felt like fire, oversensitive underneath Chanyeol’s touches and yet Jongdae was still pushing Chanyeol’s head into his chest. His cock curved impossibly hard against stomach, red, pulsing, neglected. His hole was crammed with throbbing thick cock, hitting his prostate dead on.

Soon, Chanyeol’s left hand no longer pinched his nipple, going to grip Jongdae’s left thigh, opening up his leg more and started properly fucking into his hole. Jongdae cried out as Chanyeol held him by his nipple, his teeth bit and pulled just enough to make Jongdae’s body arch with his tug. Chanyeol’s spit was dripping wetly onto his chest as he laid on his side, fucking into Jongdae so easily in this position, sliding in and out of him with so much power that Jongdae had to still himself or Chanyeol’s teeth would hurt him.

“ _Ah, ah, ah_ …” It was certainly too much as Chanyeol only focused on his left nipple as he fucked him unrestraint. The moment Chanyeol started teething his nipple along with rapid short thrusts into his prostate, Jongdae’s fingers yanked Chanyeol’s head away from him hard, but Chanyeol was insistent. Jongdae turned and thrashed before catching their obscene acts on the video on his right hand, screaming out huskily for anything that Chanyeol gave to him.

“ _Hyung…_ ” Chanyeol groaned at the rough pull of his hair.

“ _Chanyeol… I’m— close._ ”

“Fuck— hyung—” Chanyeol pulled away from his chest, swallowing his own spit before looking up to Jongdae. His face was so flush, spit dampened his chin, lips were swollen from suckling him. Then, the younger’s left hand palmed at his wet stomach and smeared the precome onto Jongdae’s needy cock, jerking in rhythm with his relentless heavy pounding. “ _Hyung—_ ”

Jongdae felt it building up so quickly, being wound up too long. As soon as Chanyeol went to latch on to his left nipple, biting a little too hard, Jongdae grunted out his release, feeling his come splattering high onto his stomach up to his chest.

Chanyeol didn’t stop fucking into him. The younger watched unblinking as Jongdae came onto his own chest before abruptly pulling out and sitting up. Jongdae was slowly coming down from the high, but Chanyeol quickly kneeled in between Jongdae’s legs, fucking his thick red cock steadily right back into Jongdae’s hole, taking the phone away from Jongdae’s hand, bringing both of his limp arms to wrap around his shoulders. With a choked groan at Jongdae’s tight fluttering rim gripping his cock, Chanyeol rested on his elbows by Jongdae’s sides, suddenly pounding even harder into his heat, leaning in to kiss Jongdae’s slacked lips greedily. His cock raw Jongdae’s hole harder and faster, making him tighten around the thick cock, puckering his rim at the mouth-watering thrusts, prolonging his orgasm. Chanyeol’s movement grew erratic when Jongdae locked his ankles over his waist and held Chanyeol’s back, looking up at Chanyeol with a dazed smile. “Jongdae— _Jongdae—hyung_ —”

Jongdae breathed softly, his hole growing more sensitive, “ _Chanyeol,_ ” but he rolled his hips into Chanyeol’s incessant thrusts anyway, clenching his heat around the cock that speared him, and Chanyeol fell headfirst into his chest, teeth biting into his pec, growled deeply with hot spit spilling from his lips as he came into the condom. Jongdae felt the heat filling up the condom, shivering underneath deep stuttering thrusts.

Lost in the moment, Chanyeol kept on rolling his hips into Jongdae’s heat, still riding off his orgasm, rawing Jongdae with thick cock, finding his way back to his nipple biting heavily into the little flesh, making Jongdae whimpered into the mischievous act. Jongdae’s hands came to grasp Chanyeol by the hair, yanking him from his reverie, pulling back him up to kiss his senseless, all tongue and spit twirling around each other.

Once the heat dissipated, their heavy kisses became gentle pecks. Chanyeol finally stopped moving, slumping forth, hiding his face in Jongdae’s neck, cock softening in his twitching hole. Jongdae’s legs fell open from Chanyeol’s waist, still trembling.

“Well… that was nice.” Jongdae stroke Chanyeol’s hair and felt up the younger’s back muscles relaxing underneath his petting. “We should take a shower.” Both of them were sweating profusely from such a workout. “Come on, Yeollie.”

Chanyeol whined softly into his nape, his tongue licking up Jongdae’s sweaty neck, drawing pleased sighs from the older.

“I’ll let you suck my tits while we shower,” Jongdae’s breath hitched when Chanyeol started biting into his collarbones at the words, chuckling at the younger suddenly filled with renewed energy with a needy moan.

After throwing away his condom, Chanyeol was already helping him, quickly finding tissues to wipe Jongdae’s come down his chest.

“You’re hopeless,” Jongdae stated amusingly, no heat to his accusations, however. Chanyeol didn’t even seem to hear him, guiding him into the bathroom while he was holding back on making fun of him. Maybe, later.

Still, Jongdae didn’t quite understand the appeal. As Chanyeol came to crowd around him, caging him against the shower wall, kissing him breathless, Jongdae’s mind wandered to Chanyeol’s hands that were roving over his chest and pecs. The lukewarm water cascade down both their backs all the while Chanyeol slurped at his skin down his throat, his sternum before licking a heavy stripe up his nipple. Jongdae could only hold on to Chanyeol’s shoulders with his hands digging into Chanyeol’s wet strands of hair. The younger didn’t do anything too much, simply sucking his nipples gently, licking at nubs, flicking his tongue around, massaging his tired muscles. Even like this Jongdae was growing needy underneath Chanyeol’s attention.

It shouldn’t be this hot. Jongdae knew his chest was definitely a normie chest, yet Chanyeol’s cock was hardening against his thighs again just from suckling his tits so gently like this. If anything, Jongdae should be worshipping the younger’s chest instead. There were more muscles and meat, abs that sparkled under the light, unlike his weak chest.

Jongdae knew they were wasting water like this, reaching out to turn off the shower, realizing too late that they were in this position for a long while. Feeling Chanyeol’s hardening cock brushing his sensitive one was turning him on once more. Their previous sex had been intense, but Jongdae wouldn’t mind coming again like this. Plus, Jongdae would be fulfilling his fair share of fantasies of being fucked in the shower by Chanyeol. Jongdae didn’t tell the younger the fact, of course. There was no need to when it was already heading that way.

“You want to go one more time?” Jongdae’s soft voice echoed in their space, breaking Chanyeol’s attention from his chest. Chanyeol came up to full height again, looking down at his smaller body flushed with heat from their earlier session.

“You— you want to?” Chanyeol looked so sated already, but there was an edge to it in the way his eyes wavered, watching Jongdae slid his thigh against his red, pulsating cock.

“Just be gentle this time,” Jongdae smiled dazedly up at Chanyeol, holding Chanyeol closer, letting Chanyeol invade his space.

Then, Chanyeol was gone, breaking out of the shower, feet stomping around the apartment, looking for another condom. The older burst out laughing alone in the shower until Chanyeol showed up again, face flushed with a cheeky smile. “Hi.”

“Hey, you,” Jongdae held out a hand for Chanyeol to take as he stepped back into the shower, shyer than before.

Chanyeol’s fingers entwined his for a moment before he looked into Jongdae’s eyes, blinking slowly. “Can… can I hold you up?”

 _Yeah— Like Kim Jongdae would refuse **that** — _“Sure,” Jongdae replied calmly with a relaxed smile. He was the older after all. He must at least keep up the tiny little façade he had left. “Be careful. Don’t hurt yourself.”

“I won’t.” then, Chanyeol was crowding him once more, kissing him deeply, his taller body curving into his smaller one, his hands working the condom onto his own cock below. Jongdae happily leaned his whole body weight against the shower wall, letting Chanyeol take from his lips, feeling up Chanyeol’s sides.

When Chanyeol’s left hand roamed down his chest again, Jongdae shuddered at the touch, thinking back about realizing that his chest didn’t seem to look that good, breaking away from Chanyeol’s heavy kisses, looking up at the ceiling, feeling lips sucking at the juncture of his neck and collarbone. “Yeol— Yeol, why do you… why do you like my chest so much?”

Chanyeol drew back, staring down at him like he couldn’t believe Jongdae was in front him before roaming down to Jongdae’s thighs to grip at the flesh, signalling the older that he would be holding him up, pressing him against the wall effortlessly. “Hyung…” Chanyeol’s forehead pressed against his while Jongdae was holding on to Chanyeol’s shoulders for dear life, and then Chanyeol leaned down against his pec, licking up his sensitive nipples. “It’s just— your torso… look really nice…” Chanyeol hummed pleasingly into his sucks while he was prodding his cock gently at his rim, making Jongdae curl his legs around his waist harder, pulling the younger ever closer into their hold. “You look really nice when you do things… fuck—” The tip of his cock pressed into Jongdae’s rim. “You look really nice in clothes and without them— Is it making you uncomfortable?” At the realization, Chanyeol drew back, both his kisses on his nipples and his cock.

“It’s—” Jongdae breathed in harshly, aching for Chanyeol’s touch, trying to find the words. “I don’t understand why my chest is so … well, you’re so into it.”

“Is it bad, hyung?” Chanyeol’s eyes filled with concern.

Jongdae shook his head, feeling safe in Chanyeol’s safe embrace, his legs pulling Chanyeol closer. “No, it’s nothing… it’s okay. I’m just a little… I don’t think my chest is that pretty.”

“Hyung, I know you’re pretty. Your chest is pretty, too.” Chanyeol took a deep breath like he was trying to find the words, and Jongdae chuckled more at his own nervousness this late in their sessions.

“Yeah, I noticed.” Jongdae pulled Chanyeol down to kiss him again, reaching down below his thighs to align Chanyeol’s hard cock with his rim. “Keep going then.”

“Fuck— hyung, you have no idea how much I fucking love sucking your tits,” Chanyeol groaned into the heated kiss, his eyes were different with a purpose. The confident words had Jongdae’s head leaned back against the shower, his heels digging into Chanyeol’s back muscles, his arms coming back up to hold on to his shoulders. Chanyeol could be confident when he wanted to be, and Jongdae’s heart always sighed at his boyfriend’s being demanding with him in sex.

“I think— _oh…_ I have some idea.” Jongdae sighed once Chanyeol trailed down to his nipples again. His body rolled gently against Chanyeol’s soothing little sucks on his nubs, feeling the nervousness dribbled away from the tip of his toes.

“Yeah?” Chanyeol was rubbing his cock between the crack of his ass, smirking when Jongdae thrust his body down to try and make his cock enter him already. “Don’t worry, hyung. I have you.” The younger pulled back to kiss over Jongdae’s lids reassuringly, melting Jongdae’s heart in the process.

After a little more prodding and teasing the older, Chanyeol’s cock finally pushed into his rim. This time Chanyeol didn’t take his time entering like earlier, shoving the tip deeper right into Jongdae’s prostate, earning a pleased moan from Jongdae. Chanyeol watched intently Jongdae’s reaction as he rocked his hips into his hole with short firm thrusts, fucking him gently up the shower wall. The weight of his gaze made Jongdae closed his eyes, his nails kneading into Chanyeol’s back, his cock growing harder at the strength Chanyeol was exuding as he held him up and fucked him into him so well, stuffing his hole with his hard cock.

It made Jongdae moan into the shower walls even louder when Chanyeol leaned down to rest on his sternum and continue lapping at his nipples, sucking them back and forth as he kept grinding into Jongdae’s ass with minute stabs at his prostate.

Perhaps, it was Jongdae’s hole milking his cock so hard, Perhaps, it was Jongdae’s tits between his insistent lips. It was hard to think with such a thick cock fucking the air out of his lungs, but Jongdae was starting to believe that Chanyeol really meant it when he said he loved his body. It was strange that Chanyeol loved his torso so much that now Jongdae was starting to love his torso as well, not for the same reasons as Chanyeol’s, of course, but if Chanyeol was into Jongdae’s tits, then Jongdae had no choice but to be into Jongdae’s tits as well. All of this was too hot to be passed off as weird.

Then, Chanyeol’s heavy grunts were echoing through the bathroom as well as he pulled back a little further and pounded in a little harder, his eyes gazing raptly into Jongdae’s glassy lustful ones, flushed ears savouring Jongdae’s little whines and moans that filled the bathroom along with the soft smacks of wet skin of their steady fuck. Jongdae’s back was going to hate him tomorrow, but it didn’t matter. Jongdae pushed against the wall behind him, rolling his hips down to Chanyeol’s hot cock, clenching purposefully, wanting to make it as intense for Chanyeol as it was for him, feeling the nice stretch in his hole, loving the fullness that had him gasping for air. It had been a while since they actually fucked as well. The older almost forgot how sweltering all of this could be, and feeling Chanyeol’s cock this thick and pulsing in his tight hole once more was fucking delicious. 

“Hyung—” Jongdae completely missed it, but Chanyeol was already coming into his condom as his voice grew higher and higher as he rode out his orgasm, his head threw back up, groaning deeply up into the air. Jongdae chuckled breathlessly, gazing at Chanyeol’s veins pulsing in his neck, his muscles tensed so hard against his smaller body as he came. Chanyeol really didn’t lie when he said he fucking loved sucking his tits. Jongdae smiled smugly to himself as Chanyeol looked at him in shame at how fast he’d just come into him. “Fuck…”

Jongdae was about to tell him that he changed his mind about coming the second time, seeing how boneless Chanyeol was already, but Chanyeol beat him to it, leaning down to tongue Jongdae’s mouth in a way that Jongdae didn’t expect him to when he thought Chanyeol was this out already. The younger sucked at his lips harshly, licking loudly, slurping into his lips so dirtily that Jongdae couldn’t keep up. Jongdae keened into the heavy tongue fuck as Chanyeol let him down to his feet slowly. “Yeol—” Jongdae tried to blurt out, but Chanyeol suddenly dropped to his knees before him. “You don’t have to—”

“Please— Hyung,” Chanyeol was pulling his legs over his shoulders to have Jongdae lean against the wall and wrapping his legs around his shoulders, letting Jongdae lock his ankles over his spine. Chanyeol’s hands moulded into Jongdae’s cheeks as he held him, staring up with tears teeming in his eyes, his breaths hot and heavy against his balls, his tongue filled with saliva licking up Jongdae’s throbbing cock. “Play— play with them, fuck my face.”

Jongdae knew he shouldn’t treat the younger roughly especially after this much already, this late at night, but Chanyeol was licking up his cock so happily, eagerly swallowing his length into the heat of his mouth. He tried to pull back, but Chanyeol’s hands were working his ass to fuck into his willing mouth. With repressed grunts, Jongdae locked eyes with Chanyeol’s big ones that were pleading, feeling the whine in Chanyeol’s throat against his cock. “ _Fuck_ , _Yeol._ ”

And Jongdae gave in, one hand held on Chanyeol’s neck for desperate purchase, one hand came to pinch his own nipple a little too harshly that it made him arch his body against the wall and roll his hips into the hot eager mouth.

Like that, Chanyeol bobbed his head even faster, keeping his eyes open to watch Jongdae playing with his own tits above him, spilling tears and spit down his neck at Jongdae’s cock fucking his throat, revelling in Jongdae’s broken moans and groans through it all. When Chanyeol pushed two fingers into his hole as he took his length all the way and swallowed it all, Jongdae bit his own lips, nipple rolled harshly between his thumb and finger just like how Chanyeol would do it, letting his release build up so heatedly. Once those two thick fingers curled a few times into his prostate along with the tip of his cock hitting the back of Chanyeol’s throat, Jongdae’s hands came down to Chanyeol’s hair for a steady anchor as his cock jerked his come down the younger’s throat, his body bowing downward into Chanyeol’s heat.

A choked moan spilt from his lips once Chanyeol pulled back to slurp up his cock, twirling his tongue on the tip, licking into the slits, suckling the crown throughout his orgasm, holding his intense gaze as he sighed happily into cleaning his cock.

The rest of their shower was Jongdae wrapping his arms up and around Chanyeol’s broad shoulders, leaning into his big body, craning his neck, slow kissing the younger boy under the small spray of the water. He had never been this content in another person’s arms, completely lost in their touch before. This feeling was one he never wanted to forget. It was so powerful that Jongdae was feeling the spring flowers blooming in his heart when Chanyeol sighed into his kiss, his arms winding around his smaller waist pulling him ever closer against his body. Jongdae felt like he had seen something of Chanyeol’s, and the younger was not hesitant to show him parts of him, trusting Jongdae, showing Jongdae all of him even though Jongdae only asked for a glimpse.

Jongdae had never asked Chanyeol to make out before falling asleep either, but the heat of their embrace consumed him his thoughts completely. Usually, when Jongdae cradled Chanyeol on his chest, he felt somewhat content as in he’d taken care of Chanyeol like he’d done his job as a boyfriend. This time was different. This time, Jongdae pulled Chanyeol closer, tilting his chin up so he could taste more of the younger boy in his arms. This time, Jongdae grew more protective even when there were only the two of them, feeling as if he was growing into the role Chanyeol had asked of him. And Chanyeol held on to his waist, staying pliant to Jongdae’s kisses.

For the first time, Jongdae fell asleep kissing Chanyeol, and he wanted to do it again.


	2. Chapter 2

It was snowing that night. Jongdae sat alone out on the grass on the other side of campus. Last Christmas was playing into the gentle merry night as Jongdae breathed in the cold air, shivering slightly in his long coat, leaning back on his palms, looking up at the little snow whirling in the night.

He should be going home by now. The party would go on a little longer before students and teachers would leave the place. Jongdae had no business staying after meeting his professor for a little drink and offering him a black tumbler as a gift, hoping their bond grow a little stronger, making it easier for Jongdae to navigate through his PhD thesis. He had no friends here. Most of the people in college were younger, and the older ones were mostly professors that had no time to converse with him about their shared profession.

It wasn’t too bad really. Staying here, though a little lonely, felt like a rest stop for Jongdae. Back in his old neighborhood felt louder compared to this. Not that he had a problem with his old place either. It was simply nice to experience this kind of loneliness, he supposed. Jongdae had recently stopped teaching just last month, finishing transferring all the important information that his replacement professor for his class needed and getting ready to research for the thesis.

December this year Jongdae had been doing a lot of nothing for a change, but he sighed to himself knowing all that was going to change again when his thesis really started.

From his right side, Jongdae heard footsteps, looking up to see his roommate in his long coat and grey scarf, fluffy hair littered with white snow, tugging on his heart a little. Right, Chanyeol had suggested they came together to the party since they were going to the same destination. It was a silent bus ride, but it was somewhat calming for Jongdae knowing he at least came with someone he knew. That he wasn’t completely alone.

 _“Hyung,”_ Chanyeol’s face was in view clearly now. His bubbly cheeks were so red at the cold, and Jongdae was reminded of his own crush for the young man. His long arms were behind his back as he approached the other.

Soon, Chanyeol was standing in front of him, and Jongdae looked up at him, sitting comfortably on the grass, legs stretched out, still leaning back on the heels of his palm, watching Chanyeol fidget in his stance as if he was stargazing up at the younger.

Jongdae couldn’t help it. Chanyeol was really attractive and attentive as a person, and Jongdae found himself staring in their little apartment as Chanyeol passed by and made food for him, but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything about it. It would be too inappropriate with him being older like this. Not that there was anything wrong with him or that Chanyeol was a kid either, but Jongdae was hesitant that Chanyeol would simply laugh at his old self trying to score a college kid.

 _“Chanyeol-ah?”_ Jongdae tilted his head, leaning forward a little, finding himself gently nodding to the beat of Last Christmas in the background _. “You want to go home, now?”_

Chanyeol’s breath hitched at his question. Jongdae thought his big ears flushing so much to the cold looked cute.

 _“You go on ahead… I want to stay for a little bit longer,”_ Jongdae paused, humming along with the music where the chorus started, singing along with the lyrics to the night a little before smiling up at Chanyeol. _“This feels romantic, you know. On Christmas, watching the snow,”_ Jongdae closed his eyes, ignoring the handsomeness that Chanyeol just radiated so effortlessly above him, sighing loudly. _“Feels nice…”_

 _“It’ll be more romantic if you spend it with someone you like.”_ Chanyeol’s voice was deep and gentle.

The next breath Jongdae took was a little heady, feeling his cheeks growing warm at the suggestion. Jongdae opened his eyes, staring up at the anxiety slowly eating Chanyeol’s confidence up. A smile slowly spread on to his lips, _“Hmm? Who do you suggest I spend it with?”_

Chanyeol chuckled nervously into his own scarf, hiding his trembling lips, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly, putting up a playful act. _“I’m… just saying it.”_

Jongdae tried to find the younger’s eyes that were flickering back to his nervously.

The younger showed his intention just enough that he could take a step backwards if Jongdae failed to catch on.

The older sucked in his lips to stop a bigger smile from breaking out before nodding to his right side _. “Don’t go home then.”_

 _“Oh?”_ Chanyeol’s wide eyes blinked, and Jongdae thought he was so adorable.

 _“I do want it to be a little more romantic,”_ Jongdae patted the cold grass on his right side, chuckling at Chanyeol who hiccupped at his offer. _“Come here.”_

The younger broke into such a big smile that pulled so many strings in Jongdae’s heart loose. Chanyeol slowly copied Jongdae, taking a seat beside him, having his hands back on the grass and stretching his long legs out on the campus’s grass.

On the corner of his eyes, Chanyeol peeked at him from time to time before looking away, shaking to himself. Jongdae didn’t want to say anything, for now, watching the snow, singing softly the rest of Last Christmas, feeling Chanyeol’s long legs slightly brush against his as they moved and stretched. His right hand could feel the warmth Chanyeol’s left hand inching closer. It really did feel very romantic.

Jongdae creaked his eyes open, Chanyeol’s dark hair tickled his chin, and he sighed happily into it, bringing his fingers to brush through the younger’s hair, his cheeks heating up at the soreness he felt in his muscles.

In the bathroom, Jongdae’s eyes kept staring at his ruined torso burning bright red and purple. When Chanyeol entered, Jongdae quickly finished and draped a towel over his shoulders, hiding himself. Jongdae caught a blush on Chanyeol’s face before he left.

Jongdae reached into their basket of unfolded laundry, fishing out Chanyeol’s huge black Deadpool tee. He usually didn’t wear Chanyeol’s clothes, except for his warm hoodies, but Jongdae felt different, an urge to feel closer to Chanyeol. It was strange, but Jongdae smiled to himself, thinking it was a nice change.

The holes in the short sleeves were so big compared to what his biceps could actually fill. Jongdae was in his short boxers, seeing how Chanyeol’s tee was right above the legs of his shorts.

Jongdae walked by his desk, reading the tasks he had planned for today. He had to go to the library to copy more materials he couldn’t borrow from the library and also returned the books to extend his lending periods.

The older smiled to himself. He could go with Chanyeol today. So Jongdae quickly put on his trousers and packed the things he needed in his backpack, bringing his laptop as well just in case he changed his mind to stay in the library longer than he intended.

He put his backpack on, not bothering to wear a jacket today, skipping happily to Chanyeol’s room, knocking a little before, peeking in.

“Hyung!” Chanyeol’s eyes crinkled at him peeking cutely into his room. The younger was just finishing wearing his denim jacket over his white tee and slinging his backpack over his shoulders.

“Hello!” Jongdae stepped in and helped him turn off the lights in his room. The older walked out first, didn’t miss the way Chanyeol’s pretty eyes gleam as he looked down Jongdae’s torso. The younger was definitely hopeless. “Let’s go to campus together.”

“You’re meeting your supervisor, again?” Chanyeol watched him shake his head adorably with a gentle smile.

“I’m just going to the library.” Jongdae thought the end of his lips must’ve curled so much when Chanyeol leaned down to peck him softly with a hum.

This time, they took the bus there. On the way, Chanyeol brought out his phone, asked him for a selfie. Jongdae scoffed but beamed into the camera, either way, leaning into Chanyeol’s side.

Jongdae finished his tasks early in the library, not feeling up to constantly stick his nose in references for today. He sat on one of the benches in front of Chanyeol’s department, scrolling through his supervisor’s suggestion in his email. His mom messaged him how he was, but that was it. Jongdae wasn’t very good at keeping contact with his friends either, so he had no friend asking how his travels to completing his thesis were.

Then, he could hear Chanyeol’s booming voice echoed across the hall and out to the entrance. Jongdae watched in amusement from the side as Chanyeol walked out with other tall handsome friends, joking around, poking with each other. The older sometimes forgot that Chanyeol had a life other than being his roommate and boyfriend. Chanyeol looked so different talking to his friends as well, still very much devastatingly handsome. He didn’t call out to him, staring at the younger walk a little further before Chanyeol seemingly motioned something to his friends, and they began cooing loudly, making Chanyeol waving them off. Chanyeol broke off from his group of friends, taking a turn in the direction of the library.

Jongdae then finally called out his name, _“Yeollie~”_

Chanyeol was so quick to recognize his voice even from afar, turning back towards him, breaking into a bright smile.

Jongdae chuckled at the younger skipping back to him and gathered his things to meet him half-way.

“Hyung! You’re here!” The taller beamed happily down at Jongdae who let Chanyeol take his backpack in his hand. “You could’ve stayed in the library. I could’ve gone to you.” There was no irritation in his voice, simply contentment.

Jongdae reached up to poke at his dimple. “I missed you.”

“ _Oh_ — It’s – it’s only been three hours…” Chanyeol’s voice was small again, his fingers digging in the straps of their backpack, his eyes blinking down with wonder.

“Come on. Let’s have lunch before you’re late to work,” Jongdae pushed his shoulders forth to move Chanyeol. The older felt himself blush at his own words as well, but it was the truth. He’d been feeling something burning in his heart since last night when he watched Chanyeol fall asleep in his hold, and without Chanyeol, it was hard to handle that feeling alone. With Chanyeol, Jongdae felt the heat simmer pleasantly in his stomach. He liked that.

When they were back at the coffee shop, Jongdae looked up to Chanyeol breathing out loudly as their walk came to an end. Jongdae only noticed just how _different_ Chanyeol acted towards him. His hand gestures were just as big, but they were a little hesitant in a bashful way. His deep confident voice was still booming, but there was a gentleness to it that pulled Jongdae’s heart forth.

“Hyung?” A knowing smile from the younger. “You want to join those researchers in there?”

Jongdae chuckled, nodding. “If you serve my coffee personally.”

“Oh, I will,” Chanyeol quickly wrapped his arms around his shoulders, bringing him into the coffee shop with him.

Time and again, Jongdae looked away from his laptop and watched Chanyeol attractively walked around the place, greeting the customers charmingly with his deep voice and his handsome smile. He found himself blushing whenever Chanyeol just leaned over the table to clean up after the customers, his long body working, his muscles flexing in the uniform, his biceps breaking out of the short sleeves as he wiped the table. Jongdae turned away giggling to himself. Goodness, he was acting like a high school girl watching her favorite idol performing. He shook his head. He should stop that. Jongdae stared at his laptop, but he didn’t read the journals on it, still trying to push his giddy excitement away. Maybe, this wasn’t exactly good for his research.

“What is so funny?” After a while, Chanyeol came back to place a glass of water for him, and Jongdae held back a bright beam as he watched Chanyeol leaning over to read what was on his laptop.

Jongdae just poked at his side, drawing a little huff from the younger. “Nothing. Shoo! Go away. You’ll get yelled at.”

Chanyeol’s eyes squinted, his lips pouting, and grumbled cutely at Jongdae before turning his head away dramatically, “ _Fine_ ,” walking back to greet the customers again.

Then, Jongdae noticed some of the female customers started whispering about Chanyeol, stealing glances and pictures of him. The older bit into his lips because he couldn’t believe that when he looked into the glass reflection, he looked exactly like them. Jongdae tsked at himself, pushing away the urge to take of picture of Chanyeol wiping the tables. He was an older wiser man.

_Begone, giddy feelings._

But they didn’t go away, and Jongdae didn’t exactly mind them really, giving in, letting them fester.

On the way back, when Chanyeol dropped their backpacks down all of the sudden to take off his denim jacket and drape it over his smaller frame, Jongdae burst into the brightest smile that day, wearing the long sleeves happily, giggling at his own little fingers that barely peeked out of the cuffs. Chanyeol was just as taken aback at his smile, laughing breathlessly along with Jongdae’s bright laughter, gazing down at the curls in his lips.

From the start, Jongdae knew that he liked Chanyeol a lot, liked him enough to kiss him, but this time, Jongdae felt like he was falling a little deeper as he found himself paying more attention to the younger. This turn of events wasn’t entirely a bad thing. Jongdae finally felt like he’d reached a safe place in his life.

He was getting a lot closer to Chanyeol this last month than previously. And it seemed like Chanyeol was also opening up more to him, getting more comfortable in relying on him. The younger had always been bold, but he was being a lot braver with his advances, a thing that Jongdae had first thought inconceivable.

Chanyeol had caught him by the arm, kissed him breathless, seeing the older wearing _his_ oversized white shirt. Jongdae was actually taking out the trash and took whatever shirt was left on the coat rack before he went out, and the dinner was forgotten as Chanyeol fucked him open missionary on the kitchen table, hungrily sucking his nipples, eagerly roving his eyes over his slim body in his unbuttoned oversized shirt. Chanyeol had never been so… impatient before (... unless Jongdae fucked him), always asking before doing, but the younger’s lust was enough to turn Jongdae on and caged him, his arms gripping the edge of the table above Jongdae’s head, his cock driving in hard and fast, his lips suckling around his torso, pulling and biting at his muscles, coming all over his chest.

Jongdae made a note to choose carefully what he wore next time. Then again, what should he _wear_ and _not_ wear? That shirt practically covered his entire torso. It was huge and billowy. And the ones that fit him still made Chanyeol stared constantly. Jongdae sighed. Well, that was a thing in his life now.

While he was still getting used to it, Jongdae saw himself started to be more blatant with his attraction to Chanyeol as well. Chanyeol’s actions had been rubbing off on him. Perhaps, that must have also added to their shared secrets.

In their small living room, Chanyeol had a TV that usually only he used to watch his favorite shows and movies whenever he was free while Jongdae spent most of his time planning out his thesis. On days that Jongdae was tired from his repetitive tasks, on days that Jongdae missed Chanyeol’s voice, on days that Jongdae remembered that he was lonely and without friends, Jongdae’s heart slowly dried up. Those days made Jongdae crave Chanyeol the most, and Jongdae would join him on the couch and let Chanyeol talked his ears off about his favourite anime, so he could let Chanyeol water his wilted heart back to full bloom.

Chanyeol laid his head on his laps, one leg on the couch rest, one leg dangling off. His favorite movie about a man who was once seen killing three men in a bar with a pencil was on. Jongdae was more interested in combing through Chanyeol’s hair than the movie since he’d already seen it with Chanyeol a few times already, enough times that it became his favourite movie too. Chanyeol just had that excitement about things that added to his charms, and Jongdae was more than smitten.

The younger seemed to notice his distraction, looking back at him with big inquisitive eyes. Jongdae could hear it before he even said it.

“Hyung?”

Jongdae shook his head, “It’s nothing,” petting the hair on his forehead, seeing the sparkle in Chanyeol’s crinkling eyes. Jongdae felt infinitely better already. The older cooed at the cute pout on Chanyeol’s lips and sighed happily, “I just really like you.”

Chanyeol didn’t stop looking up at him, but Jongdae chuckled, his finger pushing Chanyeol’s head back toward the TV. “You’ll miss the club scene.”

Jongdae was still petting Chanyeol, but his eyes were back on the screen because he, too, couldn’t miss the club scene.

The movie had ended long ago, and Jongdae should be waking Chanyeol up from his slumber, but he didn’t have the heart to. Not at the moment. Only now the fact that Chanyeol was his boyfriend truly seeped into him, and Jongdae almost couldn’t believe it. Was this something Chanyeol felt for him long before he did? Was he looking at Chanyeol the way that Chanyeol was looking at him now?

For a long while, Jongdae’s fingers traced the top strands of his hair softly, not wanting to wake him up, perfectly content in staying this little position, but Jongdae couldn’t help tracing down his handsome face. The pad of his index finger gently traced his thick handsome brows, the bridge of his pretty nose.

A hand caught his wrist, startling Jongdae.

“What are you doing?” Chanyeol’s deep voice asked him sleepily. Chanyeol was trying to blink away sleep, looking dazedly up at him.

“Nothing?” Jongdae chuckled nervously. It was kind of creepy what he was doing really. Jongdae tried to move his hand away, but Chanyeol didn’t let go.

He felt the flowers blooming in his stomach swaying happily to the spring air when Chanyeol pulled his hand back to place a kiss on the back of his hand, his cheek nuzzling into it, muttering shyly, “I really like you, too, hyung.”

It was certain then. Jongdae loved Chanyeol.

The older felt his whole face burned at the little act and his own realization.

Jongdae smiled down at Chanyeol who was returning his sentiment.

Soon enough, while Chanyeol held his hand, his eyes looked up at his face down to his torso again.

Jongdae couldn’t hold back a smug look.

Without breaking eye contact, the younger brought his hand close to his mouth, his lips parted, his tongue slowly licked the tip of his finger. A silent demand that Jongdae couldn’t refuse. The older gently pushed his fingers into his inviting mouth, and Chanyeol was quick to keep them warm, his tongue lapping up, twirling around the slender fingers. With a content hum, Chanyeol closed his eyes, his teeth bit into his flesh softly as he suckled Jongdae’s fingers keenly. Jongdae held back a frustrated gasp as his fingers moved inside the wet heat, tenderly fingering Chanyeol’s eager tongue.

“Need something, Yeollie?”

Jongdae’s other hand pushed the strands of Chanyeol’s hair out of the way. The older eyes observed as Chanyeol’s body seemed to buzz at the question before looking back to Chanyeol’s darken needy eyes.

Jongdae tried leading the younger to his room, feeling the need to surround himself with Chanyeol’s things. But Chanyeol pulled him forth into Jongdae’s room instead. Maybe, he was thinking about the same things. One of these days, Jongdae would have to ask if there was any point to having two different rooms now since they were stuck to each other every night.

He had been offering Chanyeol a lot of what he’d asked, something that he found pleasure in. Jongdae, on the other hand, hadn’t been saying much of what he wanted, not because he didn’t want anything, but because things just went with the flow.

As Jongdae leaned back on his pillows, thrusting his slender fingers Chanyeol’s heat, the older found himself unable to look away, licking his own lips at the sight of thick thighs straddling his face, ass bare, hole twitching around his digits. It was hard to concentrate, however, when Jongdae’s cock was being sucked into an eager mouth, making Jongdae’s muscles froze up. Even as Chanyeol was noisily and wetly swallowing his hardening cock, Chanyeol’s large hand roamed around his stomach, scraping at the skin tenderly, finding his nipples, and twisting them.

Jongdae laughed quietly to himself with mischievous intent before thrusting harder, curling his fingers right into where it pulled a loud shuddery moan out of the younger. Instead of letting up, Jongdae kept his fingers curled and pressed into his prostate, jabbing into it firmly and quick.

“ _Hyung—_ ”

Jongdae groaned at the way Chanyeol’s ass just arched further into his face, higher. He felt Chanyeol’s body went limp, dropping on his smaller one for purchase. His head rested on Jongdae’s thigh, bobbing mindlessly at his relentless fingering. Chanyeol’s lips felt slack, panting sharply against the base of his cock. On Jongdae’s sides, Chanyeol’s thighs just trembled, and Jongdae couldn’t help biting into them playfully.

“ _Nnng_ — hyung, please—” jagged deep voice desperately begged against his twitching cock, but Jongdae felt the younger’s hips just kept rolling on his minute jabs at his prostate. His hole seemed to suck Jongdae’s finger in further, constricting prettily around him.

Jongdae would’ve pitied him if he himself hadn’t been edged by Chanyeol constantly teasing his tits for so long. Watching Chanyeol being pliant like this quelled something in Jongdae he didn’t know he thirsted for, and Jongdae intended to take more. It seemed like whatever Chanyeol asked him, Jongdae just fell right into his role, enjoying his fair share of amusement.

Such a big strong body, and yet so _docile._

Jongdae’s free hand smacked the flesh of his ass. The younger groaned, tried to squirm away, but Jongdae’s arm draped around his waist, pushing his whole ass back onto his fingers even more. The thing was Chanyeol could’ve just fought back if he wanted, but everything about his body was doing the opposite. Jongdae wondered if Chanyeol got off to this as much, but he’d confirm later. For now, Jongdae relished in the heat that seemed to flutter harder around him.

“ _Please—_ not yet— I don’t want to— Fuck— I’m coming _,_ I’m coming— I’m _coming_ —”

His other hand wrapped tightly around Chanyeol’s thick pretty cock as Jongdae kept prodding his prostate, wondering if this would stop his orgasm. After all, Jongdae had been wanted to test things out with Chanyeol, ignoring Chanyeol’s ragged scream and drools into his own thigh below. Jongdae could feel it in his hand, blood and muscles trying to pump the come so hard out of his angry thick cock, but nothing came out, and Jongdae chuckled breathlessly at the sight of a few pathetic droplets that managed to squeeze out and stain his pecs below. Chanyeol’s body jerked and convulsed against him so hard that Jongdae had to dig his teeth into the meat of his ass, warning Chanyeol to not move so much as he kept fucking his fingers in.

“ _Hyung_ …” at this point, Chanyeol was sobbing with spit against Jongdae’s cock, body trembling above Jongdae’s.

Only then that Jongdae seemed to feel a little sorry for the young boy, withdrawing his fingers, soothing his sides. He kept his hand on his cock, however, afraid that Chanyeol might actually burst if he let go too soon. As Chanyeol’s breathing slowed, Jongdae’s lubed fingers trailed at his balls gently.

Then, Jongdae shimmied out from beneath Chanyeol, pushing Chanyeol completely down onto the blankets, rubbing on to his tired muscles gently after. Chanyeol followed easily, dropping his slacked body down, lying on his stomach, head staring blankly to the side, trying to catch his breath.

Jongdae waited patiently as he kneeled above, leaning over Chanyeol’s trembling body. His back muscles glistened with sweat, drawing Jongdae in for a bite. Jongdae’s cock jolted at the sight before lowering down to slide over the crack of Chanyeol’s ass.

“ _Fuck_.” Chanyeol’s deep voice rumbled as he turned and looked back up to Jongdae’s hungry eyes, his ass naturally canting up against his hot cock.

“You good?” Jongdae bent down to capture his slacked wet lips that quickly spread into a dazed smile.

“Fucking fantastic— _shit,_ that was fucking awesome,” Chanyeol sounded so sated already even though he hadn’t come, sighing into his kiss. Jongdae laughed against his lips breathily, sucking in his tongue. Chanyeol was too much, too much for his heart to handle, especially now that Jongdae was charmed by him more than ever.

It was Chanyeol that flipped himself over, and Jongdae quickly helped him to switch sides and lay his head comfortably on the pillow. The way Chanyeol stared up at him was crippling, turning his muscles all soft, and Jongdae silently obeyed kneeling in between Chanyeol’s long legs, leaning in for a gentle peck despite the intense happening earlier.

Chanyeol whined softly at their cocks briefly sliding against one another, his lashes still slightly wet from his tears. He looked really pretty, Jongdae’s heart groaned.

“Can you… try holding me down when you… you’re inside me?” The younger whispered against his lips, eyes vulnerable underneath Jongdae’s scrutiny. Chanyeol’s cheeks flamed impossibly harder.

The older deepened kiss harshly before pulling back to watch Chanyeol in disbelief. Jongdae sat back upon his heels, greedily studying the younger’s body laid before him. “Oh? Don’t want to suck my tits anymore?”

The younger flinched at the question, biting his lips harder, blushing profusely.

Chanyeol was about to reply when Jongdae held his hips and dragged him down further, pulling a surprised gasp out of Chanyeol. He was suddenly shyer now that Jongdae manhandled him, his legs slightly closing at Jongdae’s hungry look.

“I— I wanted to watch…” Chanyeol’s words were lost once Jongdae removed his hands only to palm himself loosely with his right hand. His left hand run down his own torso before poking his own nipple teasingly.

A smirk etched to his lips at how Chanyeol breathed in heavily at the view, cursing softly to himself, forgetting what he was supposed to say.

Wordlessly, Jongdae turned away and reached for his right side, picking up the condom, fingers patiently tearing the packet open.

Jongdae didn’t let Chanyeol wait any further, rolling the condom down on his cock before slotting himself comfortably in between his legs, leaning over his long body, lining his hard cock up with his hole, entering it steadily all the way to the hilt.

The heat was blistering, and Jongdae gritted his teeth hard the moment Chanyeol moaned loudly and clenched shamelessly around him, already feebly fucking his body down without any more prep, begging “ _Please_ , please, please, fuck me. _Fuck_ me.”

Trying to hold back his own noises, Jongdae was suddenly reminded how vocal and impatient the younger would be when he got fucked, completely the opposite when he was the one who fucked.

Instead of complying, however, Jongdae simply hovered Chanyeol’s body, hands soothing up Chanyeol’s sides before sliding to palm his biceps and down to his wrists.

“ _Hyung_ —” Chanyeol whined for him when Jongdae leaned over, having Chanyeol’s wrists crossed and pinned down above his head all while Jongdae pressed his cock into Chanyeol’s heat hard without sliding back, the tip of his cock forced down on his prostate. “ _Oh_ … _fuck…_ please…”

Jongdae’s chuckles were strained as he watched Chanyeol tried his best to squirm against his cock, sighing at the sweet grip of Chanyeol’s hole. His long legs wrapped around his smaller waist, trying to pull him closer, his wide hips working harder and rolling unrestraint to chase his own high.

Once in a while, Chanyeol would ask to have Jongdae fuck him, and all the times so far consisted of him drinking up Chanyeol’s big body moving pliantly for him. The older didn’t want to be mean and tease, but the younger was just so impatient that Jongdae had no choice but to tease a little.

Jongdae studied closely as Chanyeol’s eyes glazed over greedily watching his torso hovering above him, Chanyeol’s wrist wriggled weakly beneath his hands.

“Ah… still getting off on my tits, huh?” Jongdae’s smug laugh was cut short, turning into a deep moan the moment Chanyeol clenched his hole and pulled his hips back at the same time, letting Jongdae feel that delicious drag of his heat, trying to provoke Jongdae into fucking him senseless.

“ _Please…_ ” Chanyeol’s eyes looked lost, blinking up innocently as if he hadn’t been called out for his chest kink, as if he wasn’t fucking himself down on Jongdae’s cock, as if he’d done _nothing_. He voiced a sweet plea etched with a little proudness that made Jongdae’s ego burn. “ _Hyung…_ ”

Chanyeol was definitely too hot for his own good.

Jongdae sighed, tried his best to shift himself higher as Chanyeol fucked down on him before fucking a heavy thrust into the heat. “ _Shit—_ ” Jongdae drank it all up at how Chanyeol’s thighs just clenched around his waist, his lips going slack, his hips stopping completely, his chest dipping so low at his own heavy groan. “ _Right there—_ ” And Jongdae hadn’t even started fucking him yet.

Chanyeol’s eyes were tearing up, and Jongdae finally relented, thrusting into him with a purpose. After all, _“Please fuck me”_ was the request Chanyeol uttered so prettily when he tongue-fucked Jongdae’s fingers, and Jongdae intended, with conviction, to deliver.

The flesh around him tightened so delectably around his cock. Steadily, Jongdae sped up, trying to focus on hitting the spot that Chanyeol kept urging him to. The way Chanyeol moaned below him, worked his body down to meet him, stared star-struck at his chest rippling as he worked to raw Chanyeol with his cock. His thick hair tousled as his head swayed to Jongdae’s thrusts. From time to time, the younger would chuckle blissfully when Jongdae pounded him just right and twisted his face right back into looking fucked out, drunk on cock, downright pornographic. 

Jongdae couldn’t believe his eyes.

It struck sharply right into his heart, this feeling.

It made Jongdae wanted to hold Chanyeol forever.

It was so intense that Jongdae was bubbling up with feelings he didn’t have time to sort out yet. Jongdae tried to disguise his sudden sharp cry as purely physical, fucking into Chanyeol’s hole even faster, pulling Chanyeol’s wrists to pin them down by his head instead, hiding his face in the crook of Chanyeol’s pretty neck, pressing his chest against Chanyeol’s. He could barely hold back as droplets poured out from his eyes no matter how hard he tried to close them.

“ _Fuck… ah, ah, ah…_ ” Chanyeol’s fucked out voice pulled him back.

Jongdae couldn’t handle it anymore, draping the arms he pinned down over his shoulders. “Yeol, hold me,” his voice was shaking and raw. “Hold me.”

“Hyung,” Chanyeol responded with bated breath, hugging his shoulders, his strong thick arms holding him from below as Jongdae thrust his cock into him. “Fuck, _kiss me_ , kiss me.”

Chanyeol must’ve seen how red his eyes were that his glazed over eyes faltered, but Jongdae didn’t stop, picking up his speed, grinding his hips against Chanyeol’s hot body, building on how Chanyeol’s voice went higher and higher. The older trembled at the way Chanyeol held him close, bowing down to kiss him. It quaked his whole body at how desperate Chanyeol returned his kiss. Jongdae noticed too how his eyes were well-up with tears of his own.

“ _Hyung, fuck, hyung, hyung—_ ” Even as Chanyeol’s eyes rolled back, eyes spilling more tears, ruined hole contracting so wildly around him, thick cock spurting out heavy come in between their chests, Jongdae kept fucking him, kept kissing him, licking into his mouth. When Chanyeol’s breaths grew too sharp, Jongdae slowed down to a stop, dropping his head to the corner of Chanyeol’s neck, breathing in his sweat, kissing gently down his throat, his collarbone, afraid to hurt him if he bit.

If Chanyeol noticed his break down, he didn’t say anything about it. It was hard _not_ to notice. Unlike Chanyeol, Jongdae never actually cried during sex.

The younger was gentle about it, pushing Jongdae’s shoulders up, whispering gently for him to lie down. He complied silently. His throat was still choked up with feelings that ready to burst from his eyes again. Jongdae leaned back against the pillow, gazing up at Chanyeol who was crawling up to him and straddling his hips. His hands held Chanyeol’s hips gently as Chanyeol lined his cock up to sink down on Jongdae again, and Jongdae sucked in his lips, stopping the noises coming from his lips, throwing his head back, shivering at the tight heat engulfing his still hard cock.

“I’ll make you come. Can you hold me through it, hyung?” Gleaming prettily with sweat, Chanyeol asked with a kind voice, sitting on his heels beautifully perched on his cock. The eyes that gazed down at him, though still heated, were kind, open, trusting.

It made Jongdae hiccup and spill another teardrop. Jongdae smiled through it, opening his arms, waiting for the younger to come to him. “Come here then, Yeollie.”

Chanyeol laughed blissfully at his open arms, crinkling his eyes that teared up like Jongdae’s, smiling so brightly, showering his boyish charm onto him. The younger happily slotted himself into Jongdae’s hold, tucking his head below Jongdae’s chin, resting on his elbows on Jongdae’s sides, breathing steadily against Jongdae’s pecs.

This filled Jongdae’s heart with so much, and it felt good cradling Chanyeol in his arms like this. Jongdae’s fingers curled into his hair once Chanyeol started teething his nipples. The familiar pleasure that Chanyeol had him wanting more flooded his bloodstream. The younger switched between his nubs, slurping and biting drunkenly into the flesh, uncaring that parts of his chest were covered with his own come. In fact, it must have riled him up harder knowing that he came onto Jongdae’s chest.

Jongdae inhaled sharply when Chanyeol finally started moving his hips up and down his cock. The content whines that left Chanyeol’s lips as he rode Jongdae faster and faster had Jongdae’s thighs trembling beneath him. The older tried to ignore some of the tears still trickling his face, gulping down his little sniffles, focusing on Chanyeol’s hot breaths against his chest, Chanyeol’s burning hole swallowing his cock up so well, Chanyeol’s pretty strands of hair being yanked and pulled so hotly by his own fingers. Jongdae tried and yet focusing on Chanyeol only seemed to make it easier for him to cry.

The older chuckled through his tears, fucking gentle thrusts up to meet Chanyeol’s heavy ones coming down on him. And Chanyeol drew back from his nipples, raising up to level with Jongdae’s face. Jongdae smiled at Chanyeol’s gleaming eyes, sighing at the way Chanyeol milked his cock so deliciously, wrapping his arms around his shoulders, combing through his hair. Beneath Chanyeol’s deep gaze, Jongdae found it easy to build up, and he wanted to build it up higher like this. Jongdae kept his eyes open, staring deeply into the younger’s longing eyes. His long body rippling in muscles holding on to him, sweating on to him, making him come. Jongdae almost couldn’t believe it. Jongdae’s stomach flipped every time Chanyeol’s limp cock smack against it. Chanyeol seemed to notice as well, fucking his tight hole harder and faster down his throbbing cock, gasping hotly for Jongdae to hear.

“ _Chanyeol…_ ” Jongdae froze up, feeling the come shooting hotly out of his cock, filling up the condom heavily, sending jolts of pleasures down all over his body. And Chanyeol kissed him through it, sucking his tongue firmly. His hands came to massage down Jongdae’s torso. Chanyeol kept grinding his hips down slowly, clamping down on him.

Even after Jongdae was done, Chanyeol didn’t let go, keeping his cock warm, sucking his tongue harder. Jongdae sighed, paying no attention to his own sensitivity, letting Chanyeol do what he wanted because he deserved it, and Jongdae wanted to give it to him.

Jongdae didn’t know how long they stayed like that. Not like Jongdae cared though. Kissing Chanyeol was nice, and staying inside him was warm. It made Jongdae’s heart content, stopping his tears from falling. Soon, all his panic thoughts bled away from his warm skin, and all Jongdae could hear was the sound of their lips licking and drinking each other in the gentle night.

In their shower, Chanyeol held Jongdae closer, pressing him against the wall, hugging his waist tighter, kissing him firmly under the water as if he knew that Jongdae needed him to reassure him and hold him closer.

Jongdae could feel the nerves on Chanyeol’s skins beneath his fingers. Of course, he had been quiet for a while, especially with the way he teared up during their moment, Chanyeol’s heart grew wary. It was peculiar at how Jongdae could just read Chanyeol from just his tensed fingers digging into his back, his uneven breathing. His heart beat to the thought of being in tune with Chanyeol, being with Chanyeol, being there for Chanyeol.

“Yeol,” Jongdae started as he pulled back from the kiss to look into big pretty wary eyes blinking down at him. Their forehead pressed against one another as Jongdae spoke against Chanyeol’s red swollen lips.

Jongdae was supposed to be the vulnerable one at the moment, but Chanyeol looked like he could snap underneath Jongdae’s hold if he said the wrong thing. “Hyung?”

“Why do you want me to fuck you all of a sudden?” Jongdae didn’t want to deal with it now, but he wanted to let the younger know he was okay, now. With him near, Jongdae would be fine. Moreover, Jongdae was genuinely curious. Usually, he didn’t question Chanyeol’s preferences. The younger could take whatever from him, but _this_ was different. Not that he would complain fucking ruining Chanyeol’s tight hole. Jongdae was so sure Chanyeol was going to fuck him limp into his blankets at how he first sucked his fingers. 

Chanyeol’s eyes widened. His ears flared up, but his lips spread into a handsome confident smile that had Jongdae’s mind whirl in bliss. “Hyung, you’re really hot when you fuck like…” His heavy gaze flickered down to his chest for a moment. “You look really pretty fucking me...”

Jongdae chuckled, feeling blossoms burning in his cheeks, grateful that Chanyeol seemed to understand him and go along with his line of questioning. “You really are _still_ getting off on my tits?”

Chanyeol’s smile was sheepish. Jongdae tiptoed to peck his nose cutely, at which Chanyeol blushed harder, holding him closer. The older was somewhat startled when Chanyeol kissed him deeply, moving against him so intensely, breaking the soft mood they were building. Once Chanyeol drew back, his eyes were certain, confident. “Fuck me against the wall next time. I want to feel your chest against my back.”

“What—” Jongdae choked on his saliva, unable to process Chanyeol just unabashedly asking him that. His smaller arms tried to push Chanyeol away at his shoulders, but Chanyeol didn’t let go, pushing Jongdae further back against the shower wall, pressing himself closer, brushing his lips against Jongdae’s scoffing ones. “You’re shameless!”

Despite Jongdae’s mind being in shambles, one thing was certain: though the younger was blushing just as hard as Jongdae was at his own shameless words, it seemed like Chanyeol being shy about his _taste_ was dissipating quickly at a dangerously high rate. 

For the rest of the shower, Jongdae’s toes curled into the marble floor as Chanyeol purred in delight against his nipples, suckling them as his fingers knead into his pecs and his abs, his hair tangled lovingly with Jongdae’s fingers, his head cradled gently by his slender arms.

As they got ready for bed, Jongdae held Chanyeol close in his arm, petting his hair gently, feeling his cheek pressed against his chest, wondering if Chanyeol could hear how hard his heart was beating. The older imagined nights without him next to him, and he felt his heart wrenched, now more than ever wanting to sleep where he slept.

That weekend, Jongdae contemplated for a long time before deciding to take the Saturday off, shyly asking if Chanyeol was free for the day. Well, Jongdae already knew because Chanyeol just finished his midterms and college let off their students for two weeks before going back for another semester.

“Yep, I’m binge-watching Chicago Typewriter again, and you can’t stop me,” Chanyeol stretched against his body as he was waking up, ducking away from his embrace, seeing the clock pointing at 9 o’clock.

“Oh…” Jongdae bit lips, letting Chanyeol go, watching the younger sat up, holding back a laugh at his crazy morning hair sticking up everywhere. “I guess… I should’ve asked you earlier then. I was going to ask you out for a date—” Chanyeol’s eyes went wide. “ _But_ what am I talking about? I have no plans today—”

“ **No** _, I_ have no plans today, hyung!” Chanyeol chuckled brightly, hands coming down to slap his thigh. “What are you talking about, you big dummy?”

Jongdae burst out laughing at him doing a complete 180, legs going up to kick Chanyeol’s shoulders. “ _You’re_ the big dummy.”

Chanyeol squealed gleefully as he caught Jongdae’s feet with his hands, swaying Jongdae’s whole legs around playfully instead. “What? How’d you know?”

Jongdae giggled, trying to pull his legs back. He was quite ticklish at the feet, so he couldn’t have Chanyeol doing that to him.

“Where are you taking me?” Chanyeol finally let go, hands still caressing Jongdae’s calves absentmindedly.

Jongdae didn’t want to say anything because just walking with him toward the N Seoul Tower was plenty scary enough. Was this the same feeling Chanyeol felt when he made the first move to ask him out?

They had finished their breakfast and taken the bus to where Jongdae wanted them to be.

On the way, Chanyeol was trying to figure out where they were going, and Jongdae was silently breaking down in his mind. What if Chanyeol didn’t feel the same? Jongdae huffed to himself, trying to find a way out if things didn’t work out. The older tried to study Chanyeol’s expression, but the younger seemed like he didn’t get it yet. _Well,_ he was quite the dummy after all.

“Ah… this… this is the tower?” Chanyeol tilted his head cutely before looking down at Jongdae. “You want us to go up there?”

Jongdae blinked looked around at the many people walking around, most of them, couples. His toes curling into his sneakers. “Let’s just… rest a bit— oh, there, um, let’s have some cotton candy!”

Chanyeol nodded happily, agreeing quickly, and they stood in line behind, _Jongdae noted_ , couples.

Sometimes Jongdae was surprised at how dense Chanyeol was—

Jongdae paused his pawing at his own yellow cotton candy, looking back at Chanyeol who was taking ridiculously big bites out of the cotton candy that the soft blue patch was covering his whole face as he seemingly slurped it into his mouth slowly.

_Was… was **this** … being dense? Jongdae knew he was dense, but was Jongdae **this** dense before—_

Jongdae sighed, slumping his shoulders. How long did Chanyeol have to deal with him like that? The whole time after confessing? Up until Jongdae realized that he was lacking in the relationship big time?

Jongdae breathed in and shook his head. If Chanyeol could deal with his shit, Jongdae should be able to as well. Instead of giving up his fate to the gods, this only seemed to fuel his appreciation for the younger more. He had to make the first move then.

“Oh— Look! Hyung! Love locks!” Chanyeol exclaimed brightly, finally noticing what the many people around him were doing. “You know? This is where you declare who your _SeoulMate_ is _,_ Ha—” Chanyeol burst into a peal of laughter, free hand reaching out to punch his shoulder repeatedly. “ _Get it?_ Like 𝚂𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚎? 𝙴𝚗𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝚟𝚘𝚌𝚊𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚢 _~_ ” while Chanyeol was testing his English pronunciations, Jongdae’s legs were shaking, hard enough to almost fly off their sockets.

Jongdae hummed, nibbling at his own cotton candy, sweating profusely between his fingers.

He had to say it though.

With a deep breath, Jongdae tried to sound as unaffected as possible.

“So… you want one?” Jongdae muttered into his cotton candy, feeling his ears burning so hotly at the tips.

“What?” Jongdae could feel Chanyeol’s eyes on him, but he didn’t look back at him.

“I mean… the lock.” Jongdae felt the candy melting on to his lips, “I’ll get you one— if you want, Yeollie.”

But Jongdae got curious and looked to his left where Chanyeol just stared at him, lips faintly blue of the cotton candy. “Well… oh… Um, yes— yes, please.”

“Yeah?” Jongdae’s lips slowly curled into a smile. His eyes slightly watered from the harsh wind in this high latitude. Seeing Chanyeol matched his expression made him feel a little braver. “If you buy one, I suppose I should buy one, too.”

Chanyeol’s voice was soft. “Should we get the expensive ones?”

Jongdae chuckled at the question, his nervousness trickling away with the wind. “Of course, let’s take the ones that can’t be unlocked—” Chanyeol hiccupped, and Jongdae thought it was adorable. “—And with pens because we don’t have any… unless you don’t want to write anything?”

“I want to write, um, stuff!” Chanyeol was quick to answer.

“Let’s uh… finish our candies first.”

Jongdae thought he must have sounded a little happy at that, but he didn’t care. The older dinked the fluff of their cotton candies together before going back to paw shyly at his yellow mesh of candy.

Suddenly, he felt his side being invaded, looking to the left to see Chanyeol scooted close to him. Their shoulders touched, and Chanyeol’s lips were so close, but Jongdae was pulled out of his trance when Chanyeol leaned down to bite into his cotton candy.

“Yah! Rude!”

“You’re too slow!” Chanyeol was already devouring all of his own candy before looming over his, but Jongdae stepped away with intent to finish on his own.

“You’re not eating mine!”

“Even if I say please?” Chanyeol looked up to him from the bench, pulling off his most lovable expression.

Tempting, but— “Nope!”

Jongdae’s hands trembled with the pen. His own yellow locker was in his left hand, his right hand hovering for a while on what to write. Though he had been more vocal of his actions lately, Jongdae was still the subtle one while Chanyeol did most of their talking and the acting. It was nice having to be led by Chanyeol while also offering what was asked of him. It had been uneventful, how they started, but Jongdae knew this was it, and it could grow into even more.

As thoughts whirled around in his mind, Jongdae blinked at the words he wrote on the lock, blushing.

He looked at Chanyeol who looked away, getting caught for staring, but Jongdae didn’t say anything, gently nudging the younger, telling him he’d go look for a spot he liked.

Jongdae sat up from the bench and walked around the many pretty little locks around him. To be honest, Jongdae didn’t care where they locked it. He just wanted to take a little breather without Chanyeol right next to him, and messing up his thoughts.

**Don’t leave me.**

Jongdae stared at his own lock, fingers scratching his head. This must have sounded so desperate, but before he thought about changing his intense words, Jongdae stopped himself. He wanted to be the louder one this time. Chanyeol had always been the more straightforward one. So Jongdae gulped down his nerves and wrote more instead of erasing.

“Hi.” Chanyeol was behind him, a small handsome smile cast downward just for him.

Jongdae nodded and stepped forth to lock his lock. The older watched intently the reaction of the younger when he read what Jongdae added. Chanyeol’s brows arched up, his lips twitched into a warm smile, his eyes clearly tearing up.

**Stay.**

Chanyeol blinked away the welling tears in his eyes, bring his blue lock forth to lock it right into Jongdae’s.

**Okay, hyung.**

Jongdae read and blushed.

As both of them took the elevator up tower hand in hand, their lockers weighed down by a promise that lightened up their hearts with their confessions spilled out of their chests as on the other side of their lockers both read “ **I love you.** ”


	3. Chapter 3

Jongdae was typing rapidly about the connection he was finally making after absorbing so many journals, starting to see the strings in the information. A ding from his phone distracted him, but Jongdae powered through and recorded the links his mind magically made out of nowhere.

Once he was done, Jongdae leaned in his chair, picked his phone, and read the text.

**send me a picture, pls, hyung~~**

Jongdae shook his head at the plea.

**You have a whole video of sucking my tits and fucking me into coming, isn’t that enough?**

Jongdae watched in amusement as Chanyeol’s typing dots floating on the screen multiple times before the younger just sent him a bunch of incoherent letters and words strung together.

Chanyeol had left to see his parents in the countryside for the week during the short break. Chanyeol had been pestering him all day even before he left.

This was the first day. And the sun hadn’t even gone down yet.

Jongdae rubbed his fingers into his face, sighing into his palms.

This boy was hopeless.

**😭** **😭** **😭** **hyung meanie~**

Jongdae scoffed.

**🙄** **go away, I’m working.**

As Jongdae left the room to refill his water, the sudden multiple consecutive dings filled his ears. Even though Jongdae burst out laughing to the empty apartment, he still felt together and one with Chanyeol even from far away. Jongdae’s heart warmed at the fact that Chanyeol no longer felt as bad interrupting his workflow, even joking about it. After all, how they started was Chanyeol giving Jongdae too much space that Jongdae forgot about Chanyeol entirely at times. Now, they both invaded each other’s time. Jongdae admitted that it was annoying at times, but it was the good kind of annoying. Jongdae realized he loved being pestered by Chanyeol.

At 9 o’clock at night, Jongdae stretched himself, happy that he’d finished his tasks before time. The next few days Jongdae had to do field works with his supervisor, unable to stay at the apartment and continue his thesis. It would’ve been rough if he hadn’t gotten it done on time.

Jongdae sighed and reached for his phone.

Aside from the previous tantrum Chanyeol threw, the younger went radio silent on him.

Jongdae chuckled. Oh, angsty youth.

When Jongdae stepped into the bathroom, his eyes blinked slowly at the bathtub.

He did well with not procrastinating his tasks today.

Hence, a reward for oneself was warranted.

A smile slowly spread on his lips.

Jongdae sighed into the warm water, nuzzling his nose, breathing into the water, watching the water bubble happily. As he scrubbed at his sweat, a ding from his phone tickled his ear.

**good night, you meanie** 🙄

Jongdae blinked at the text, saw the time. It was 10:40 pm.

A mischievous smile slowly spread on his lips.

There was always a first time for everything. Jongdae wouldn’t say this was sexting, but he shrugged, turning the front camera on. He would see in the morning if it would be counted as sexting.

Vertically Jongdae held the phone because his torso looked nice half-submerged in bubbles. A hint of abs below the wavering water, one of his nipples dark and hard, his free hand hid his other nub with bubbles, fingers sometimes wandered around his chest and rubbed the soft bubbles into his wet nipple. He craned his neck a little, showing off the sharp ridges along his throat, rolling his chest against the water, making sure the curls in his lips were apparent with malicious intent.

Jongdae snickered evilly to himself.

It was a thirty-second video. It should be enough.

**Good night, Chanyeol.**

Jongdae quickly turned off his phone after that, enjoying another thirty more minutes of the warm bath soaking his skin with the gentle acoustic songs from his laptop in his room seeping into his ears.

It was strange to sleep alone after holding Chanyeol for so long, but it wasn’t too bad as he laid soft in Chanyeol’s hoodie, breathing in Chanyeol’s pillow, draping himself with Chanyeol’s blankets.

The next morning, Jongdae felt his heart crumbled hard when he realized Chanyeol wasn’t in his arms.

Feeling sappy, Jongdae turned on his phone, wanting to look at Chanyeol’s texts and pictures to heal the burning bruise.

And when _82 messages_ all from Chanyeol greeted him on the home screen, Jongdae smiled. He had never been so happy to read letters jumbled together that made absolutely no sense, but it made sense all the same to him.

Jongdae didn’t want to know what happened in between the time the texts started flooding in and the time they ended, but the last message was all that he lived for.

**fuck, i love you, hyung.**

Jongdae’s heart fluttered. All the panic he felt drained away just like that.

**I love you, too.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's so self-indulgent this one. oh god. thanks u for reading this crab rave. plot was falling apart, but hopefully jongdae's torso made you forget about that, like how it made chanyeol reverted back into neanderthal.


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